cuckolding

blondegirlashley

Experienced
Joined
Aug 31, 2008
Posts
37
I don't really know where to begin. It's been a while in the works, and now I guess I'm actually "cuckolding" my husband. He likes it, I think. I still have terribly mixed feelings on the whole subject. I guess I want to talk it over with someone. I've found some of the conversations I've had on here very theraputic in the past. But in general, does everyone think this is a good idea or a bad idea? The cuckolding, I mean.
 
I think it's only a good idea if you two are in a solid relationship and both agree to it. There would have to be some ground rules about how it all goes about et al but it should be something that you feel comfortable with. If you have any doubts, voice them and discuss them. I know alot of women would probably love to have the chance to do so... and visa versa but sometimes things are easier said than done, afterall it is your body.
 
could be very good

I don't really know where to begin. It's been a while in the works, and now I guess I'm actually "cuckolding" my husband. He likes it, I think. I still have terribly mixed feelings on the whole subject. I guess I want to talk it over with someone. I've found some of the conversations I've had on here very theraputic in the past. But in general, does everyone think this is a good idea or a bad idea? The cuckolding, I mean.

I've never been cuckolded by the wife but I would like to..in the bedroom anyway..so my opinion
will be bias..
I say test the waters a bit more to satisfy your curiousity about hubbys reactions..If you know he likes it for sure then I say why not enjoy yourself. I think a woman who has learnt to enjoy herself infront of her husband is very sexy & if hubbys like me he will think it's sexy to see his wife like this.

Pm me anytime ..I'd love to chat
 
I don't really know where to begin. It's been a while in the works, and now I guess I'm actually "cuckolding" my husband. He likes it, I think. I still have terribly mixed feelings on the whole subject. I guess I want to talk it over with someone. I've found some of the conversations I've had on here very theraputic in the past. But in general, does everyone think this is a good idea or a bad idea? The cuckolding, I mean.

Pandora's box
 
Yes, exactly, a pandora's box. It has already begun. Physically, I guess it feels good. Emotionally, it's a roller coaster, I think for the both of us. It's certainly boosted our sex life together, but in a sort of dysfunctional way if that makes any sense. He's remained faithful to me, and I've vowed to try to make him happy. I do love him, and thought my faithfulness would be what kept him happy. It's a little strange to cope with the opposite idea. At times he's an emotional wreck, torn between knowing what I'm doing, and loving it on the other side. I guess it's hard to understand let alone get the idea across, but I know some of you know what I'm talking about.

Are there any other issues I should be worrying about?
 
Yes, exactly, a pandora's box. It has already begun. Physically, I guess it feels good. Emotionally, it's a roller coaster, I think for the both of us. It's certainly boosted our sex life together, but in a sort of dysfunctional way if that makes any sense. He's remained faithful to me, and I've vowed to try to make him happy. I do love him, and thought my faithfulness would be what kept him happy. It's a little strange to cope with the opposite idea. At times he's an emotional wreck, torn between knowing what I'm doing, and loving it on the other side. I guess it's hard to understand let alone get the idea across, but I know some of you know what I'm talking about.

Are there any other issues I should be worrying about?

well there is the obvious safe sex rule. And I know it has been said but let me state it again, Communication will make or break this situation. It sounds like you are really on the fence about this, if it helps try to remember guys don't tend to hold sex with so many emotions as women. If the two of you choose to move forward with this i would suggest trying to make your marriage as solid as possible outside of the bed room. so the emotions arn't on such a roller coaster.
 
I don't really know where to begin. It's been a while in the works, and now I guess I'm actually "cuckolding" my husband. He likes it, I think. I still have terribly mixed feelings on the whole subject. I guess I want to talk it over with someone. I've found some of the conversations I've had on here very theraputic in the past. But in general, does everyone think this is a good idea or a bad idea? The cuckolding, I mean.


Are you into swing sex or Cuck sex, that's the thing to work out. True Cuckolding is either the female screwing around behind an unknowing husband's back and everyone laughing at said hubby, or a wimp male being dominated by a strong female and made to watch her have other men regardless of his true feelings.

Swing sex doesn't have to include other women, it can be one sided with the female getting all the attention... A guy getting off big time seeing his wife fucked by other men isn't being Cuckolded, he's being a kinky sod enjoying a bit of swing sex LOL.

There are always mixed feelings to begin with, it would be a bad omen for your marriage if there weren't. If you are comfortable with it and he is happy to let you do it, then why not if it's giving you both pleasure.

Wife and I swing a lot, and I love seeing her taking cock from multiples of men, it turns me on like hell, but I aint no wimp Cuckold, I get my entertainment outside the marriage as well.

This is another thing you have to think of, the day he wants to fuck your best mate while you watch,
 
Yes, exactly, a pandora's box. It has already begun. Physically, I guess it feels good. Emotionally, it's a roller coaster, I think for the both of us. It's certainly boosted our sex life together, but in a sort of dysfunctional way if that makes any sense. He's remained faithful to me, and I've vowed to try to make him happy. I do love him, and thought my faithfulness would be what kept him happy. It's a little strange to cope with the opposite idea. At times he's an emotional wreck, torn between knowing what I'm doing, and loving it on the other side. I guess it's hard to understand let alone get the idea across, but I know some of you know what I'm talking about.

Are there any other issues I should be worrying about?

If you are emotionally unsure, i would suspect it might not be right for the two of you. Ya, im sure the act itself feels good, but you are attaching feeling to it probably and dont feel comfortable doing it, and it seems like you are doing it to please him, not please the both of you. It does make sense what you are saying. I think he might have some more issues that maybe he needs to work on..... being that your not ready/willing to push yourself to HIS limits. If he is an emotional wreck.... doesnt that speak for itself?
I would be worried about the jealous portion taking afoot of it all, and wrecking what you have. Sounds like you do have a good base, id work on that further before going outside the box more. Damn, your understanding and willing to try... good for you
 
Just some responses to the last three posts.

In an odd way, I guess I'm doing this to try to keep the marriage as solid as possible. We certainly weren't having as much sex as we are now, and acting more like roommates than lovers until I found out what he was into. (sort of stumbled into his email and chats and videos he was trying to hide). He's the kind of guy that wouldn't normally admit to things like that, but on the advice of one of my online friends, I brought it up while lovemaking. It totally shocked him, but I could see he was into it. He has no interest (so he says) in cheating on me, and if this is making him happy, then why not? I'm just concerned to make sure the satisfaction outweighs the risks to our relationship.

And it certainly seems to be cuck sex for sure. It's not about him being any sort of active participant. I guess maybe that's partly what concerns me. He's normally a very together, confident, stable man. He's assertive and can take charge at least at work. I guess I sort of identify, being at least somewhat in touch with some of my more submissive moods, but I dunno, just wasn't expecting it from him. Maybe I just have trouble thinking of men in general like that.

My first 'encounter' involved me going on a "date" while he stayed home. He told me what I was doing, and what was being done to me was all he could think about those hours. He obsessed about it, and it was extremely awkward coming home at first, wondering if I had done the right thing. I'll spare you all the details, but he waited up for me until I got home (maybe 4am) and basically grilled me about every detail of the night. I didn't want to talk about it at first, but he kept prying and prying until, basically I got mad and told him everything. I sort of put him down and I think he got off on that, because we had sex right after.

I wouldn't call him an emotional wreck, but it certainly seems to give him highs and lows. At times he will seem very excited in the days leading up to another date night. Other times we'll be quiet in bed, and he will express how hard it is to know I'm going off and being with other men.

Maybe I just need to know if I'm doing good here by going along with it, or do I just say no? Do I take it a few steps further even? Thanks to all for your advice and support so far.
 
I can pretty much see a lot of stress within ... both of you ...

Like it has been mentioned earlier, what exactly is the way he sees it or wants out of it will make a difference .. in the long run.

Like when you mentioned, you had brought the topic up and may be he thought you wanted it ? I am not suggesting anything that you didn't ask it in proper way ...

He himself knows for sure that there hasn't been as much sex as you should have ... That might be one reason why he wants you to have your fun ... and again like you said gets torn with that idea of NOT being able to be with you for your fun and again ... wanting to please you! (sounds confusing ??? Well, this might be the same turmoil within him tooo ... perhaps!)

Whatever you do, if both are comfortable and happy and recognise that each is doing whatever it is, for the other's pleasure more than oneself (and having fun too ) at the same time .... like you said it might strengthen things ...

Try to pry out his inner kink and thoughts. Keep trying and you might end up finding what exactly he wants :) Sent you a PM too ....

We can only hope ... :) and we must always hope! :) :) :)

Regards ...
 
Just an observation, but it sounds to me like you're not the dominant, cuckolding type. You're only doing this because you think he wants you to. It's not something that you WANT.

Secondly, it sounds like he isn't sure what he wants. Part of him wants this, and part doesn't. If he were a true cuck, he wouldn't be grilling you after your first date. The female is completely dominant in a true cuck relationship.

Sounds to me like both of you have some soul searching to do. Best of luck to you.
 
Obviously no one can tell you what is right for your relationship, only the mutual understanding between the two of you can guide this. If you're on this board you’ve read several of the stories, and if you found things that your husband was guarding it has been on his mind. The fact that your husband was not sharing that aspect of his life with you probably indicates a degree of insecurity on his part as to whether you will accept that from him or if he is fearful that in some way it may demean him in your eyes. Why don't you each pick out a story you like about cukolding, and trade them, and then discuss why you liked and chose the one you did. From my own personal experience I can give you the viewpoint of another male coming from the direction that you don't know me and won't judge me so I can say whatever I feel without fear of recrimination. I was with you until you got home and he started asking questions and you were having difficulty in relating things until you got "mad". I personally would've preferred that when you came home you would have been bubbling with excitement, eager to tell me every last detail. I personally would not want to have to drag the details out of you, you had the enjoyment of the evening and now can provide vicariously his enjoyment by relating all of the subtle nuances of your dalliance, including show and tell, soaking wet panties, still wet cum spots all of your blouse. He's allowing you to have fun, but there is a trade-off and it is his having fun, and you are the key to that and instead of worrying about whether he accepts what you're doing, remember he let you walk out the door knowing what would probably ensue, so what was he possibly thinking, besides there was something in it for him, the allure, the excitement, the interminable wait, and finally the moment arrives and you don't want to talk about it??? When you come home from your next date, wear a skirt, no panties, no nylons, grab him push him down on the floor or bed and sit on his face and then start to tell him everything that happened. That, to me, is the kind of cukolding I would love.
 
Another reply to cover the last few posts....

It's true, I'm not at all the dominant cuckolding type. I feel more like the submissive shy type, at least inside. And it probably comes across a lot when I'm online too, but in rl I am assertive and can even be quite bitchy and demanding (or so I've been told), so doing some soul searching, I can see where he might have that impression of me. I've probably been harder on him than I should have been in a lot of situations. “nagging wife” syndrome or something. Is it so wrong to go ahead and please him even if it's not totally my thing? On top of that, and maybe it goes towards this whole thing working out, I might feel a littel sorry for him in a way too if that makes any sense.

I don't know what a “true” cuck relationship is exaclty. But I know enough to realize there's no perfect set of guidelines for many of the roles we have in life. I got the impression while he was grilling me that he wanted me to get mad at him. That he wanted me to come home and gloat, and be bitchy, and put him down about the whole thing.

And please don't be too hard on me for not knowing how to be once coming home after a night like that. How does a wife walk in the door and tell her husband all the gritty details of the date she just went on without him. How does she bring up how nervous she was, and also how excited, and how this old friend of hers was so polite, and such a gentleman, and was looking very attractive, and how he made her feel special again, paid attention to her, flattered her, complimented her, paid for her dinner, and took her home with him despite the fact he knew she was married? How does a wife tell her husband that she walked into this man's house, fully intending to sleep with him? How does she just go into how he softened her up with wine, and they made out on his sofa and he felt her through her dress, and whispered in her ear how much he wanted her. How does she describe being led by the hand into the bedroom, and undressing her partner, not her husband, and letting him undress her. Does she describe how attractive he was? How fit he was? How she loved touching his chest and stomach, and loved feeling his body press down on hers as she lay in his bed naked? Is it too much if she explains how hard he was, and how the man's cock really was bigger than his. Does she tell him how it felt to be pinned under him with her legs spread, letting him inside? Does include how she didn't ask him for protection, and instead waited for her partner to bring it up because she was afraid of offending him?

How does a wife tell her husband all that the first night either of them are trying it?

I don't meant to sound harsh, but just don't expect me to be an expert on this from the start. Even though it's been going on for a couple of weeks now, it's all still so terribly new. That's why I'm here, and I certainly value the tips you're all giving.

I also wanted to add that I think people are thinking there's no upside. I hope my brief description of my side of things lets you know that there is some serious enjoyment here. I guess I still have trouble admitting I get any fun out of it, but I do, and so does he. But it's like going on a roller coaster. You get off and look back at what great fun the ride was, but the next time you're considering going up, you get scared again and think of chickening out.
 
Yep, everything you said and more, if you're really trying to cukold, how big and how good it felt would need a lot more in depth description. The harder his cock gets and the more he fidgets the better a job your doing of driving him nuts in a good way. (From my point of view) I can't explain how you can love someone (as I do my wife) and yet enjoy immensly her association with another male, seems dichotomous, but works very well for me!

The experiment is go outside the box and you may find your perameters are broader than you think, push the boundary, If you exceed the limit he'll say so, but in the mean time he's gotta LOVE you for being the partner that was willing to experiment and try things that ??? % of husbands would love to try and never get the chance because their wives would never give them what you've done already!!
 
My wife was nervous at first but grew to love it then grew to hate it!
Roller Coaster emotions exactly what cuckolding is
 
Okay, explain that last one. I really need to know all sides. You're not the first to mention how great it was at the start, and then how it fell apart later on. Right now we're on the up part of the rollercoaster, or maybe even the fun down part, but we don't want to go too far down either. Unless there's some sort of upside to it.
 
Ashley

Ideally, you both should talk things over ... his wants and wishes and your wants and wishes ...

If you read it all, everyone talks of your comfort and his ... and having a solid relationship and that it'd spice up and so on ... is there someone who actually said WHAT exactly the cuck relationship will be ? They won't and they will not ... because all who have been into it or have know it too well, know for sure that it is NOT exactingly definable (no matter what the dictionary comes up with !) ... It is a relation and it needs to be defined by the two involved at first and then others are made to fit in their assigned roles (as agreed by all innvolved!).

So, it'd be good to talk things over in greater detail with your cuck husband itself. What he wants out of it and what he expects you to have out of it ... and what will be his wants and needs ... and will he accomodate your wants your needs, if any ... and so on! And this might need frequent appraisal .. may be after each new encounter or atleast periodically since things might change a bit and doing this periodic appraisal will spot any change/falling apart ...

It can spot when things are going a bit overboard and you both can try to make it STAND in a plateau at that point when it is just about to go overboard and may be try to prevent the down-slide!!!

I am too sure how all this will work, but may be you can pick up the best thoughts in here and try to fit it in your scenario and work things out for the best of you both. Frankly, though this involves a 3rd person, I'd say with blatant bluntness that it is YOU TWO who should be considered (by both of you!!!) ... the third person is just a tool in the play and he gets his share of fun and there it ends .... (unless it is a very good friend of both and thing go further .. etc; ) So, always consider the comfort. fun and happiness of ye both ... first and then secondarily the tool (of course, he must have his share of happiness too, a bit atleast!) ...

If some areas seem vague in what I have posted, re-read and interpret as your intuition tells you to and you'd be fine, I am sure ... Good luck and have lots of safe fun!

Regards ...
 
I think the collective is starting to get a grasp of what is going on here, and hopefully you are becoming more 'intune' with it all. It is a brand new realm of life that your going into and somewhat against the 'norm' (whatever that is). I'm pretty sure everyone 'forgives' you for not knowing what to do next. You cant expect someone who has never done something .... to know what to do. There is some guidance needed along the way..... and i think thats where you and your husband need to communicate. It would have been maybe a bit easier on the both of you if you had discussed, in depth, how this was going to all play down. I dont mean how you and you other partner, i mean you and your husband..... Example, was he going to pick out your clothing for the night, give you some money to spend (not saying you dont have your own, but rather it come from him), perhaps drive you someplace to pick up something new for the night..... stay up late and wait for you.... how you were going to talk it over later... what he was expecting of you in regards to how you act afterwards etc..... all of that!
I know that because you have never done it before, its hard to plan out, but you have now. Maybe now if you are planning another, you can discuss how the first went and talk about what might change for the second. This is a bit of a fantasy being filled out on both parts, so i think it is meant to be 'fluid' and change along the way. I dont think there will ever be the 'perfect night' where all the pieces fit exactly (no pun intended). Communication is the key, and there seems like there should be more between the two of you.
I know a couple that are into cuckolding and she does the same...... sets up a date, goes out, has her fun, while here husband sits and waits... she comes home and they discuss it at length, whereby the two get sooooo turned on that they cant keep their hands of one another. The exact specifics... they dont share, i wish they did..lol... but i think its a matter of finding what works best for the two of you. Dont expect it to be perfect right away, its something that will have to evolve over time and communication
Your paragraph where you say basically 'what am i to do?'.... where you list all those questions on how its to play out........ i think thats what he wants to know.... all those specifics.... at least thats what i would want to hear.
You mention you personalities outside the bedroom..... im not so sure that plays into the equation. The fact he is confident outside or you are assertive or 'bitchy' could be irrelavent.... you two found eachother, married, and are experimenting is awesome and hopefully will bring you together more. I think sometimes just because we are one 'type' of personality at onetime doesnt mean we cannot be another...... ie. the so-called.... lawyer by day, biker at night.
Despite how you might think you feel, i do think you are getting a grip of it all and understanding how it works....... run with it and enjoy it
 
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Yes Fireymatt, I think you're hitting on it exactly! And I've been getting basically the same message frome veryone on here, which is that this is about us and our relationship, and not the third man (or men). Which is good, because that's basically how I've been taking things. I'm doing it for our relationship and am not as much into these other guys (even if admittedly, they ARE sexy).

And I have to let you know that right now, as I'm typing this, I'm about an hour away from another date. Hubby approached me a few hours ago with the idea of me having my partner over to our own house tonight. He is leaving the house and I've called my friend to let him know that we have the place to ourselves for the balance of the night.

And I did take everyone's advice, and we talked things out a bit. He's really excited for tonight, and I'm fucking nervous, as I always am before doing this. Especailly because it's at home. I guess that should make things easier, but it's just very close. I guess it's pretty kinky. I won't just be fucking around on hubby, but I'll be taken in our marital bed, wedding and other photos still on walls and dressers in plain view everywhere.

That's sort of another complicated aspect of this whole thing, the third guy. I mean, on the one hand I don't mind lying to him. He knows I'm married and wouldn't hesitate to lie to my hubby about what we're up to. He didn't try to talk me out of anything when I first expressed how I was interested in an affair. Still, I'm to act like I really want him (physically I do), and pretend like hubby doesn't know what's going on. It's a real relationship while we're together, and has all that's carried with it. On top of that, there are two guys already. One more frequent, this will be the fourth time together. The other been with only twice so far.

But anyway, just to give some of you a little thrill, I'm waiting for him in a little black dress with spaghetti straps, lowish cut front and back, hem a few inches above the knee, with thigh highs which I've pretty much only worn once ever with some lingerie I put on for my hubby at New Years a year ago. (He found them at the bottom of the laundry basket it seems, and took care to wash them for me tonight). Hubby has asked me to be loud with him, and tell him that he's a way better lover than hubby. I'm going to do it for him, and I hope he gets off on it when I tell him afterwards, and maybe even tonght in the hotel where he's going to be. (We're pretending he's gone for business).

Thanks to everyone that's discussed this with me so far. And thanks Gregy70 for your comment. Sort of helps knowing I'm turning guys on, because it reassures me that hubby is really enjoying me doing this.
 
holy shit you sound like a dream come tru! damn right you're turning a lot of guys on. do you know how many guys are living vicariously through what you're doing? i can tell by the gentle encouragement from everyone that we all want this to succeed for you, and want every single little detail.

Am I right here people?
 
Have to say after adopting the lifestyle (cuckolding) there seems to be a range of emotions that often go through a cycle.

ONE..starting up great excitement and at the same time gut wrenching nervousness with both equally nervous.
After the first time usually any reluctance the wife harboured flies out of the window no matter if she discloses or plays the whole thing down to husband.
More often than not the husband feels jealous in the cold light of day but the longing for his beloved wife to be with another man far overrides any untoward feelings.

TWO..What most people dont understand is a couple in the cuckold lifestyle are usually very much in love with otherwise normal lives. They have a deep understanding of each others needs and after a while realise the lifestyle requires a bit of give and take just the same as in any other relationship.
When my wife comes home fresh from her lover with her pussy well used still the odour of sex clinging to her body sometimes we have such intense sexual pleasures as she whispers what they did to each other.
However sometimes she wants to be quiet so I have learnt to be patient and she always shares with me eventually.

THREE..For us we find it keeps things fresh if dates are kept rationed...we say every couple of months usually.
Involving men we already know can bring complications so we like to keep our sexual pleasures very secret and never play at home.
We dont have lots of men involved..five men over fifteen years mainly becouse my wife only enjoys bareback.

Well sounds a bit clinical reading back but let me assure you after twenty years of married life our sex life is still thrilling and pleasurable.
My wife seems ageless and assures me that I am still the best.(Of course I am well aware she is telling a white lie after some of the expert lovers she has enjoyed with much better equipment than me.
 
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