What is the weirdest thing you ever stuck up your ass?

Nobody?

Come on with all the fags here somebody had to have stuck weird shit up their ass.

Fess up fags.
 
A bottle of natural lotion. It was thick but nicely tapered and once I got it in I shot a few squiirts and I got the whole bottle in. Since then I have used the same lotion on a shovel handle, a cuecumber, and a rescue inhaler. My favorite remains the shovel handle, it touched all the right places and never let me down.
 
Is a box of Corn Flakes weird? I know the corners hurt.
 
Cucumbers many sizes, carrots, cigar tubes (3 at once) plastic glass bottles, hamers handles multiple screw divers candles..flashlights and of course dildos.. and fingers
 
Too many things to mention. Some of the things mentioned above, and other things.
 
And......

Corn on the cob.
Baseball Bat
Plunger handle (it was plastic and moulded into 5 balls at the end)
Marble paper towel roll holder
 
And......

Corn on the cob.
Baseball Bat
Plunger handle (it was plastic and moulded into 5 balls at the end)
Marble paper towel roll holder

I know that pluger they sell it at target. I stocked those things for years and always thought they looked like they could be fun.
 
I was always worried about losing items so must had a wide base or were in a condom with the end hanging out.

Blunt end of bic pens
Cigars
Attempted a warm hot dog inside a condom nut didn't work
Brush handle
Screwdriver handle
Baby rattle handle(baby was grown up)
Little kids plastic toy hammer
Fingers

I'm sure there are more things besides toys just can't remember them
 
My Ex Wife's head....as she always had her head up her ass, I figured it had to feel good!
Just kidding....really. I have gotten a well lubed finger up there. Tried an electric tooth brush (battery one), but it hurt a bit....so I must have a tiny asshole. Hurts like crazy when the doc does the finger thing.
 
A stick of frozen butter when I was a teenager. It was great until it melted.
 
a thing or two

I never got it all the way in but a trailer hitch ball. Right after I became single again (several years ago) I would put the metal ball in a laytex glove then lube up and wedge it between my cheeks using my heel to hold it in place as I laid back to stroke. The pressure was intense and a time or two I almost got over the widest part. I have also put a condom over a full size floor Jack handle and eased back on it until I had several inches inside. Wow, that made me squirt. I have squatted down on a shampoo bottle in the shower. Think that about covers it. Oh yes, a GD I. Had once asked me to get the shifter knob on my truck up my ass. She and I both got turned on by it. The truck was idling and being. A Cummins it had me close to cuming.
 
I never got it all the way in but a trailer hitch ball. Right after I became single again (several years ago) I would put the metal ball in a laytex glove then lube up and wedge it between my cheeks using my heel to hold it in place as I laid back to stroke. The pressure was intense and a time or two I almost got over the widest part. I have also put a condom over a full size floor Jack handle and eased back on it until I had several inches inside. Wow, that made me squirt. I have squatted down on a shampoo bottle in the shower. Think that about covers it. Oh yes, a GD I. Had once asked me to get the shifter knob on my truck up my ass. She and I both got turned on by it. The truck was idling and being. A Cummins it had me close to cuming.

Awesome!
 
When I was 13 or 14, I used an end of back bath scrub brush. I don't why I did it. Well, I think I do now. I thought, 'People stick things in their ass, so it probablt has to feel good'...

It did. But it was a little odd. And I only did it once.
 
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