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Men and "bi-curiousity"

I've had a gay friend for about twenty years. Just recently I let him know that I was interested in sex with a man and, surprise surprise, he was more than willing to accomodate me. Even though I am a big man (6'3" and 235) and have been married to a woman for ten years, I really desire the submissive role with him. I suppose it's just the other side of the coin, I am the dominant penetrator in my marriage, and want to be the submissive penetratee with him. Plus he has a beard - I don't know why more women don't like facial hair. My wife complains if I don't shave, but I love his beard!
 
This has been on my mind a lot. My wife and I haven't had sex in over three years. I get attracted to women, but have thought about men. I love watching women giving blowjobs and find myself longing to try. I was molested when I was a teen and it kind of left me with a lot of questions. I have always liked anal play. Since I am left to my own devices for sex, my wife had gotten me some toys including some dildoes. I really got into it. I usually wait until I am alone in the house and then enjoy it. I stepped up to a new "lifelike" one and that really took me over. I even stick it to the wall and pretend I am going down. But that is the extent of it. I may never know the feeling of being with another man. I am over 50 and time is passing me by. I love my wife and feel that being with someone else would be cheating. So I get to have sex with myself and just pretend. Funny, that lately I don't fantasize about women, but about men. I read on another thread that people's sexuality is fluid and maybe I am moving along the spectrum from hetersexual-bi-curious to more bi. I still do look at women. Just too many things going against seeing the fantasy real. Of course, fear of disease, possibility of one of us falling in love and I really don't have any plans on leaving my wife. So I just find myself alone and pretend. So yeah, bi-curious.
 
MrSneakyinPA said:
I have wanted to try "it" for as long as I can remember. Can someone tell me what it's like please, to actually be naked in bed with a horny man?

It's probably different for everyone. I guess I like the no-nonsense approach of the guys I've been with.

MrSneakyinPA said:
How did you go from wanting to do it, to actually doing it?
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I'm not sure what tipped the balance. To put this a little in perspective, I didn't even meet (saw on the street, heard about, etc, yes, but not properly met as in being introduced or getting to know) anyone I knew to be openly gay in all my childhood or teenage years. I was terrified of being gay, and as I'd heard that "if you try it, you'll like it," I didn't try it. I instinctively knew I'd be a bottom femboy in bed, which made it scarier. I nearly tried it a number of times, chickening out every time. Then I just sort of forced myself to go thru with it, meeting up with a guy I'd met online, roleplaying his maid.
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gingerbush951 said:
I've had a gay friend for about twenty years. Just recently I let him know that I was interested in sex with a man and, surprise surprise, he was more than willing to accomodate me. Even though I am a big man (6'3" and 235) and have been married to a woman for ten years, I really desire the submissive role with him. I suppose it's just the other side of the coin, I am the dominant penetrator in my marriage, and want to be the submissive penetratee with him. Plus he has a beard - I don't know why more women don't like facial hair. My wife complains if I don't shave, but I love his beard!
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I think your desires are probably quite common. They certainly describe me. With women, I've almost always been expected to take the lead, the dominant role. So in my fantasies I want to be submissive and more times than not I want to be submissive to a man. That hasn't happened for me yet but I think about it often.
 
Well....

I am just exploring my Bi side now. It is turning out to be very hard to do. Most of the men I have talked to so far have just wanted me to fuck their brains out, or fuck me silly. I would like to find someone very easy going to do some exploring and experimentation with. I wanna find out what I like and don't like. Does that make sense?
 
Recovery_Plan said:
I am just exploring my Bi side now. It is turning out to be very hard to do. Most of the men I have talked to so far have just wanted me to fuck their brains out, or fuck me silly. I would like to find someone very easy going to do some exploring and experimentation with. I wanna find out what I like and don't like. Does that make sense?
Click to expand...

That makes perfectly good sense. I am currently "exploring" as well. As a married stereotypically "straight" guy I find it very difficult to experiment, aside from watching a ton of gay/bi/transvestite porn that is.

When one is in a small town, in an identifiable existence, what is the first feasable step?
 
Mine was a long journey. Brought up in liberal surroundings, friends and I would go naked as much as possible...in the woods, swimming hole or just at night before bed. Also went to an all boys school as well as an "old world" athletic club where swimming nude was the norm. So there was always comfort around nude men and mild exploration as a kid was fun.

In college, I was a lady's man and couldn't get enough pussy. But sports locker rooms, showers, nude beaches, etc. were fun times. Mainly joking around but was curious why some guys would get hard around me. Later on, I enjoyed using that "power" with some gay friends I knew were in committed relationships but flirted with me so I flirted back, showing off my body and cock and enjoying their reaction.

But it wasn't until after my divorce that long-time friends (MF couple), also nudists, asked me to join them in some 3way fun. It was supposed to be for the wife to have two men, but it was clear that he was curious and used our close quarters while playing as an excuse to touch, taste, etc. And when the wife had a heart condition, the husband and I continued exploring and playing both alone and in front of the wife.

So for me, the big thing was knowing the other person...trust, comfort and knowledge that we were all clean. That let me let go and just explore ways to feel good and make others feel good. But it also made it hard when I moved away because while opportunities have presented themselves, I didn't have that same base of friendship, comfort and trust. And as I'm from a small town, it makes it even harder as many times trying to meet people for the first time has proven difficult as nerves, doubts or family issues on the other person's part has left me standing alone. So all I can say is to be understanding that many others are in the same boat with the same feelings. So understand their fears and nerves too. But above all, make sure you know you both have a clean bill of health as that helps make things a lot easier.
 
Bbb13 said:
We have been going thru some very hard times. Divorcd was asked for. She knows I like a vib in me, I am trying to find out if I am bi or just like a vib in my ass. A man in my fantasy would be nice, so we discussed my situation.
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It's good that you told her. My wife knowing I'm turned on by men has been a strain sometimes, but well worth it so we can talk about it.
 
MrSneakyinPA said:
I have wanted to try "it" for as long as I can remember. Can someone tell me what it's like please, to actually be naked in bed with a horny man?

How did you go from wanting to do it, to actually doing it?


Question for Lit Women: As you probably know, most men are totally turned on my 2 women into each other in bed. Is there any turn on factor for women to see 2 men?
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MrSneakyinPA - being new to m2m myself let me explain what it was like for me. My sex drive has always been high but my wifes was not. We had a great marriage and I didn't want to cheat on her. But I started looking at gay porn and wondering what it would be like and finally after many false starts and setting up meets and then cancelling, I just went through with it. Scary for sure but I had picked well and the man I met took it slow. First couple meetings, he did me. Then I went for some kissing and cuddling and then just on the spur of the moment I decided it was fair to only recieve even tho he was perfectly happy with the arrangement. I cannot truly describe what it felt like when I took his cock into my mouth other then to say - I was very surprised at how soft it felt (still feel that each time I suck one today). First time I topped, I remember thinking how much it was just like when I had anal with a women!

So chat with guys on here and other sites for m2m - get a good feeling for someone and then DO IT! You may not like it or find the guilt too much to handle but at least you will know for sure!

Hope this helps!
 
Recovery_Plan said:
I am just exploring my Bi side now. It is turning out to be very hard to do. Most of the men I have talked to so far have just wanted me to fuck their brains out, or fuck me silly. I would like to find someone very easy going to do some exploring and experimentation with. I wanna find out what I like and don't like. Does that make sense?
Click to expand...

Now see, I rarely play with questioning or curious guys. The reasons are varied, and I won't spell them out here.

But what you state would get a second look from me (or someone like me). It would start with a coffee or something similar to see about sincerity, comfort and mutual compatibility. Ok, yes, you can call it a date. From there things may dictate a second date and something more, or not. But rest assured that many single gay men are looking for the very same as you.

HTH,
Topher
 
It is hard to find a male who wants to make it last and make it memorable. That is the way lot of men are......there are a few who really enjoy man to man.....not just get off........I understand your post.
They are out there, just keep looking......it is worth it when you find it......hang on for the ride..
 
For me, the answer is HELL YES. I'm sure it's individual. But honestly? Its a bigger turn on when it is two straight/bi guys experimenting, or a straight/bi guy who is doing it cause he knows its a turn on for me. I love watching and fantasizing about me and two guys, all touching....or me rubbing my pussy watching two guys.

....getting very horny.....someone want to IM me about this fantasy.....


[/QUOTE]Question for Lit Women: As you probably know, most men are totally turned on my 2 women into each other in bed. Is there any turn on factor for women to see 2 men?[/QUOTE]
 
Bbb13 said:
We have been going thru some very hard times. Divorcd was asked for. She knows I like a vib in me, I am trying to find out if I am bi or just like a vib in my ass. A man in my fantasy would be nice, so we discussed my situation.
Click to expand...

I really do hope you manage to find some resolution to this. I love my partner being bi...love it, embrace it, facilitate it. I've always known-we met when he turned up to give my ex his first bi experience...we also play with women but it's the bi stuff for him that really rocks my world. His absolute openness to experience isn't necessarily connected to his bisexuality but more a reflection of his own hedonism but where ever it comes from I love it in him.

Your wife needs to know that your desire for men in whichever way you do is absolutely no reflection on her or your love, regard or respect for her. It's no threat...it's completely seperate and you need to demonstrate that to her constantly. She needs to feel desired and wanted for herself by you...her security in your love and desire for her is key...exploring sex with men does not detract from your relationship in any way...she still comes first...

You may also have to accept that if she is unable to accept this side of you, you have 2 choices...you may have to accept that for you, this will only ever be a fantasy, something you desire and want but unattainable currently for you...maybe gently introduce some of your gentler fantasies with her when you are together particularly if she enjoys the anal play you say you like...she may find herself getting unexpectedly aroused when she sees just how turned on it makes you...On the other hand, you may only be able to pursue this behind her back...only you will know which is the best route for you...and I am not recommending or condoning this pathway...it will be for you to decide if your marriage can withstand infidelity...but it will also be your responsibility...be responsible, be safe and don't expose her to unnecessary risk especially if you are going to explore anal sex...it's still the highest risk behaviour...always use protection and try your hardest to pick your partners carefully...

Best of luck...you're on a journey I went on years and years ago and I love our lifestyle...but if she can't come with you...check your priorities...
 
My my this a hot thread....i have been curious forever, too scared to follow through on what i want to do, sorry Evan for leading you on, I really do want to suck your cock and let you fuck me.
 
When I was younger I used to go camping with my friend and his family. Me and my mate were in a tent together and one night we was talking about some stuff, and got onto the topic of trying stuff together.

Long story short, he "went down" on me. Well he put his lips over the tip of my cock and moved up and down without using his mouth or tongue.
We were both very inexperienced and I never had the guts to try anything to him.

Sometimes wish I did. He always had a bigger cock than me I was always jealous.
 
So, I've been curious for years, but things have never quite worked out. I've had a few chances, but there just hasn't been the "spark" that got me to try much. The one time I was actually into it, he stroked me to orgasm, but didn't want me to return the favor.

Meanwhile, after all the hesitation and failure, I still find the bi stories are the ones that get me going the most. Perhaps it's the kink, maybe the hedonism, but they get me going like nothing else.

I also suffer from the post-orgasm blues, where my interest diminishes, plus the fact that I'm not attracted to men, but the thought of playing with cock and cum really can get me going.

Someday I hope the situation will work out, but for now, I guess I'm still just "curious".
 
Dav81 said:
I'm not gay by any means but sometimes, just sometimes there is something so ridiculous hot about being with a man. I guess that makes me bi and I'm totally okay with that.

Also, men seem to give far better head than women on average.

Also, maybe it was the sheer naughtiness of it but I completely went in my pants the first time I went down on a guy (a roommate in the Army no less).
Click to expand...

Are you sure you are not gay? You sound pretty gay to me.Maybe you are gay, and don't relize it, and you are hoping that you are bisexual,or straight, and you "think" you like women, when deep down inside you really don't.
 
Anyways to answer the OP's last question, I enjoy seeing two men together,but I can't help the disgusted hateful feeling I get when I do. This feeling is not directed to bisexual/gay men directly (well maybe just a tiny bit),but this feeling is more so directed towards me.
 
And another question, that I hope a logical thinking person can answer. Why is it so important for some bisexual men,that women finds them attractive, or do they get turned when two guys go at it? Is it really that important you to, that a woman likes it, or is disgusted by it? If that's the case why not be with men permanently?
 
Queen_Vicki said:
And another question, that I hope a logical thinking person can answer. Why is it so important for some bisexual men,that women finds them attractive, or do they get turned when two guys go at it? Is it really that important you to, that a woman likes it, or is disgusted by it? If that's the case why not be with men permanently?
Click to expand...

I think that its still human nature to want to please the opposite sex, even gay guys are best friends with females, it doesn't need to be sexually pleasing, just in general.

Though from most guys point of view, some may feel if they show a woman they are comfortable with their sexuality enough to be with another man, then they may try to do so to "please her" but maybe subconciously be hoping they will someday repay that situation and get with a girl for HIS pleasure.

Though thats only one side of it, like I said its just my thought.
I am Bi-curious and though I have done nothing with a guy, I would hope my girlfried would be "pleased" by the idea. As would I be thrilled by the idea of her with another woman.
 
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