Dear X:

Dear BB,

At first I thought you were a dick. Now, I'm finding out you're a douchebag. Which is worse. So, go on and win the thing, content in the fact that the rest of us don't care.

E.
 
Dear Britain,

So, now that it is summer, is there a law that says each member of society has to mow their lawn and strim their weeds, and trim their hedges as often as they can, for long periods of time? Is there a prize for the person who's lawn and hedges never seems to grow an inch, because its kept so incredibly short? Considering the state of most people's gardens, I wouldn't be convinced. But as far as the noise level is concerned, people are practically mowing lawns from 8 am to 7 pm in any of the given gardens around the UK.

Could we not agree on a basic time window in which everyone could mow and strim and trim to their heart's content? Please? For the sake of someone that highly appreciates and values silence?

Yours, in hope.
Vana
 
Dear Doctor

If you hurt me like that again, you'll never see me again. Regardless of what is wrong with me.

Me

Dear Britain,

So, now that it is summer, is there a law that says each member of society has to mow their lawn and strim their weeds, and trim their hedges as often as they can, for long periods of time? Is there a prize for the person who's lawn and hedges never seems to grow an inch, because its kept so incredibly short? Considering the state of most people's gardens, I wouldn't be convinced. But as far as the noise level is concerned, people are practically mowing lawns from 8 am to 7 pm in any of the given gardens around the UK.

Could we not agree on a basic time window in which everyone could mow and strim and trim to their heart's content? Please? For the sake of someone that highly appreciates and values silence?

Yours, in hope.
Vana
* Hugs * :rose:
 
Dear cat,

please come back. I miss you. And so do your brother and sister.

Love,

your Matte*



















(* = Swedish for female owner of pet)
 
Dear X,

Je t'aime. Mon corps a très envie de toi en ce moment. Mon esprit et mon coeur tu aident à travers l'océan avec toute la passion que je contiens. Tu es plus beaux que n'importe quoi que j'ai vu. Je t' appartiens maintenant et pour toujours.

LA
 
Dear Cute Guy at the Drive-up Window;

Thank you for your kind attention. My entire order was correct. I gave you the right amount of change and you thanked me quite warmly. The fries were delicious, the best I've had in quite a while, salted just right, fresh and hot. And you tempted me with that offer of two apple pies for a dollar, but I think the chocolate chip cookies were a better choice for me. There were plenty of napkins in the bottom of the bag, even though I didn't really need them because I licked the salt and chocolate from my fingers. The large Diet Coke for a dollar was a real bargain, too, filled with ice and a refreshing beverage. It fit perfectly in my cup holder. Yes. Everything was absolutely perfect for a quick snack as I drove home.

I just wish you would have included the straw. *sigh*

Sincerely,

The drink-challenged good little witch in the blue car
 
Dear X,

What is most exquisite about you is your languor. You have a slow, smooth, undulating quality that allures me over and over again. When I watch you, I lose the ability to see anything else.

LA
 
Dear Cute Guy at the Drive-up Window;

Thank you for your kind attention. My entire order was correct. I gave you the right amount of change and you thanked me quite warmly. The fries were delicious, the best I've had in quite a while, salted just right, fresh and hot. And you tempted me with that offer of two apple pies for a dollar, but I think the chocolate chip cookies were a better choice for me. There were plenty of napkins in the bottom of the bag, even though I didn't really need them because I licked the salt and chocolate from my fingers. The large Diet Coke for a dollar was a real bargain, too, filled with ice and a refreshing beverage. It fit perfectly in my cup holder. Yes. Everything was absolutely perfect for a quick snack as I drove home.

I just wish you would have included the straw. *sigh*

Sincerely,

The drink-challenged good little witch in the blue car
This is why I have spare straws in the glove box of my car ;)
 
This is why I have spare straws in the glove box of my car ;)

Dear Starrkers,

I also do this. In addition I have plastic knife, fork and spoon, some paper napkins and some ketchup. The number of times one or all of these have come in handy more than makes up for the loss of space in the glove compartment...

x
V
 
Dear little diva,

Seriously I have had enough of the screaming and crying and tantrums this afternoon. Please give me a break. We could have so much fun if you would just cut it out.

1) I will not go back to the states just to buy you a book that you keep screaming for for the last 8 months. If you would have wanted the book you would not have thrown a fit. You made your choice then I can not change that now. And no I am not ever buying that same book for you because of the way you keep acting over it. Not to mention I have no idea even what the title was or anything.

2) Please stop yelling at me that it is summer just because your asinine teacher said it at school. The 21st of june is the first day of summer I would not lie to you about that so no you are not changing your calender to say it is when it isn't, even if it does feel like it.

3) You are not watching Gremlins...I'm sorry but you are 3 I don't want to have to deal with the nightmares after you do.

4) STOP talking to my boobies. I swear if you say 'come on boobies follow me' one more time I am going to go mental and the next family member who laughs when you say something about my boobies is getting their head cut off!

5) Last but not least, stop yelling for heavens sake I'm right in the same room with you there is no need to screech everything.

your very distressed mommy
 
Dear Parents,

Where is Nan's fly-swatter? My life has been hell since you left because she can't find it, and it's all she's going on about. She can't hear what I say to her because she won't wear her hearing aid, but somehow she can detect the buzz of a fly about 25 metres away. I offered her a roll-up newspaper, but apparently that's no good. It has to be the blue plastic one you bought her.

So where is it, please?

Zade
:rose:
 
Dear X,

I'm starting to hate you. I don't want to hate you. I really don't. Because it just means I was right about one thing, the one thing that should never, ever, be true.

We will never be the same, will we?

L.

~~~

Dear different X,

Stop it. Because you're doing it every fucking time, it's no longer something others appreciate. It's become annoying and utterly meaningless.

Dino.
 
Dear Dino,

You're my hero. Meet me out back sometime and we'll go plan world domination with our Instruments of Evilous Torture and Badass SuperVolt Electric Eels.
Fine day for a flaying. :cool:

Yours in terror (who also happens to be in complete agreement with stuff),

Bluebell
 
Dear Dino,

You're my hero. Meet me out back sometime and we'll go plan world domination with our Instruments of Evilous Torture and Badass SuperVolt Electric Eels.
Fine day for a flaying. :cool:

Yours in terror (who also happens to be in complete agreement with stuff),

Bluebell

Dear Bluebell,

It's so nice to have a fan. A person, not an instrument. I have a paper fan already. Those you see in period movies and China towns. Anyway, when the Electric Eels have done their jobs and are no longer electrically charged, can I have them for soup?

Dino.

P/s: I'm so glad you understood stuff. :cattail:
 
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