Anal question... lol

coatcheckgirl

Really Experienced
Joined
Sep 8, 2006
Posts
278
Well, I have had the distinct pleasure of being gently coached into using a smallish buttplug a couple months ago. It, combined with some other...tittilation..was phenomenal. Here's the problem... I am not brave enough to go it again, alone. Anyone have any solid do's/don'ts? Where do I go from here?

Thanks,
ccg
 
Well, I have had the distinct pleasure of being gently coached into using a smallish buttplug a couple months ago. It, combined with some other...tittilation..was phenomenal. Here's the problem... I am not brave enough to go it again, alone. Anyone have any solid do's/don'ts? Where do I go from here?

Thanks,
ccg

are you asking how to get a partner or how to use it alone? and.. if you're afraid, why do you want to?
 
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Maybe "afraid" isn't the word I want. Nervous, maybe that once I start i won't want to ever stop? Maybe I'm anxious that I'll hurt myself. Mostly I just want someone along to guide me and make sure I'm taking my time. Also to share the success of finally getting the plug in...

we shall see... perhaps an anal slut I shall be?
 
Maybe "afraid" isn't the word I want. Nervous, maybe that once I start i won't want to ever stop? Maybe I'm anxious that I'll hurt myself. Mostly I just want someone along to guide me and make sure I'm taking my time. Also to share the success of finally getting the plug in...

we shall see... perhaps an anal slut I shall be?

You should be nervous if it could impair your ability to function sexually or socially, but apart from that?

The next time you take a dump, try to check the diameter of the products. Visual inspection will do, no need to start fishing and taking measurements with a caliper. Anything (that is otherwise suited for butt play) with the same or a smaller diameter is guaranteed not to hurt you, as long as you go slow and well lubed.
 
Maybe "afraid" isn't the word I want. Nervous, maybe that once I start i won't want to ever stop? Maybe I'm anxious that I'll hurt myself. Mostly I just want someone along to guide me and make sure I'm taking my time. Also to share the success of finally getting the plug in...

we shall see... perhaps an anal slut I shall be?

I think most of us would argue that sex is better with a partner. There is something about those whispers that allows us to go a little further. maybe it's a girl thing, I don't know.
If an "in-person" person isn't available, have you considered asking someone from here to talk you through it using audio or visual chat?
 
I'm betting you've had lots of offers to "help you" with your problem already. ;)
 
...Where do I go from here?

I'm not sure what's holding you back but I can tell you a few things from our experience. (My gf really really loves anal sex, I mean, more than you, me, and the City of San Francisco, so we try to work at making it as much fun as possible.)

Use condoms on everything that goes in your butt. They're cheap from amazon (we buy durex) and they make it much easier to keep your surroundings clean. Also buy some finger cots from amazon.

Try working a medium-to-small vibrator into your ass. It seems to really help loosen things up and it's fun in itself. Try stimulating your ass and pussy at the same time (I'm a mere male, but I've got eyes).

It's more fun with company than without, but it's still fun without. I find it exciting to wear a butt plug around for a while and occasionally apply a Hitachi vibrating wand to it, and to my cock.

Try to imagine pegging a guy or gal, and see if you think it might be something you'd like. We enjoyed it and a lot of others do too. Some women just enjoy having a girlcock one. Our favorite is a Feeldoe.

If you have some questions you're shy about asking (and you don't mind asking a man) feel free to PM.
 
Thanks for the responses, sorry for being so long in replying.... was off on a fabulous cruise. Looking forward to getting back into the swing of things on this (back) end!

xxxo
 
The easiest thing for me when I was preparing for anal was to put half of a long-ish bullet vibe up there to loosen up the muscles down there.

Might I also suggest trying out a bead/plug combo? My current one has three different sized silicon balls and a base at the end. It's a great way to slowly ease into a larger size and feels great!
 
Try doing some yoga to calm down your mind and focus your attention to your body. Let go of your fears and stigmas and every possible thing that prevents you from exploring your own body. It is yours to explore at any time to any extent you wish to do.

Start exercising and take some L-Arginine to get the blood flowing in your body. You want to get your sexual energy up, so you can be turned on and brave enough to explore.

This will get you going then invest in some small toys to try penetration and explore the feeling by trying different strokes and techniques.

MEN: Our ass has the passage to our prostate which seems to cause problems for us in the future. Let go of your fears and start your exploration more on the medical side :) Look into Aneros.
 
Overheard this story while attending a concert.

Lady calls fire rescue for paramedics. They arrive at her door. She is wearing a bag over her head. She has them enter the home. She wants them to remove a light bulb from her rectum. They need her to remove the bag so they can assess her reactions to their procedure. She removes the bag. She is the most famous local TV news anchor in the region.
 
Took me the longest time to try and now I love it! Build up to bigger things, use lots if lube and relax ! When going bigger push out while your pushing the plug in, really helps! Nothing like an orgasm from anal! And the best thing is having somone cum in your ass the most amazing feeling, it does hurt at first no doubt, but it is so worth it in my opinion. I personally like to make sure I'm clean inside and out before as not into the mess. If you enjoy it just keep working at it they are the best orgasms, mine just keep coming and coming!
 
Try booty beads.
booty-beads-2-3711-11_1207123057982.jpg
 
Lube. Then more lube. Then a little more for good measure. For anal, there's no such thing as too much lube.

If you're a little nervous or uncertain, consider starting in the shower - get nice and soapy, then start exploring yourself with a finger. No real fears about mess and the soap makes a great lube.

Also, check "The Blank Manual" thread at the top of the forum page - anal is an extremely popular topic, and the moderators have collected the best threads on the subject in that area.
 
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As someone who has some sort of a plug up there most of the time, here are my 2 cents. Pleasurable booty play is something that requires knowledge about your body and its functions. Right attitude is required, too - if you're all tied up about waste and potential mess, then stick to your girl parts only.
- have your place and time to experiment. You want to be really comfy and relaxed, plan at least a few hours for yourself only, one hour is NOT enough to prepare yourself, have a good time and clean everything up. Have a good alibi prepared for not responding to the door or phone if some family shows up unexpectedly.
- mind what you eat and drink, observe what food produces what kind of waste (yes, you're playing someplace waste comes out). Some fiber and right amount of hydration produces solid waste that leaves you almost completely clean. Wash up and you're ready to play. If you can plan your eating so that it works out the right time for your play, you're golden.Since that's mostly not the case:
- clean your rectum before play, no need for big and deep enemas (nothing wrong doing an enema, though). Take a dump, a few squirts of water up your bum with a bulb or a big syringe and expel. Repeat a few times until you're clean and good to go. Start with small amounts of water, just to clear the rectum. If you fill up more, you'll end up diluting waste upper in your intestines and it will keep coming out slow and persistent enough to kill any kind of mood you were in. If it happens, and you're still up for it, do an enema or two to get clean.
- after cleaning wait some time (5, 10 minutes), sit on the toilet, insert your finger (spit is your friend) and swirl it around a few times. If there was something left in the pipe, it will come out. A squirt of water and you're done.
- prepare your bed with some towels, maybe a latex sheet, some disposable (paper) towels , lay on your back. It is easier to relax on your back than in doggy style position.
- use good toys - only silicone, borosilicate glass or steel. If using any other material, condoms are a must, but that limits your options with lube. Get a few of different sizes; from your finger (OK, you have a finger for that) up to the width of your log you observed in your toilet
- lube is required, but not in the insane amounts everyone is talking about (lube, lube and more lube, you're not into fisting, yet). Smear it on your toys, outside the anus (and the skin around it) and as deep as you reach with your fingers. I swear by coconut or olive oil (but be careful to keep it out of your vag, laying on your back helps). Water based lubes dry up too fast, silicone lubes are a bitch to clean (otherways are great!). Get a small plastic bottle with a drip cap and head to your kitchen for a fill up. Oils are not friends with condoms.
- start with your fingers. Feel, explore, try, learn what pleasures you. When you're confident (relaxed), go with small silicone toys (plugs). when you're relaxed and comfy with the toy you are using, you can go for a (slightly) bigger one. It is that simple. Feel the stretch - not the pain. If there is pain, you're going too big. Only minor pain is tolerable, and that is just for the time you learn to relax your muscles. Your bum will "learn" to take things - time is important, too. Insert a plug and leave it there for a while. For small ones that won't stay in by themselves, make up a harness with a trousers belt and some rope so you can go around your house, the medium ones will stay in fine. Keep it in for as long as it feels comfy.
- clean after play, well - try to organize things in your mind before you play.Be ware of drips, spills, have some paper towels handy. Hot water and soap is (usually) enough if you don't share your toys.
- play, play and more play, don't get put off if there is no fireworks going off every time . The more you play, the more confident you get, you get skilled at preparing, you know more how your body works and reacts, the more pleasurable it gets. Listen to your body for when it's had enough, and learn to enjoy it. Bum play is as good as genitals play, combine it and it becomes much much more than just the sum of them. The best orgasms come this way.

Happy exploring
 
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