Lauren Hynde
Hitched
- Joined
- Apr 11, 2002
- Posts
- 21,061
Chicken 
Pretty please, play with me.
- Thread starter WickedEve
- Start date
WickedEve
save an apple, eat eve
- Joined
- Oct 20, 2001
- Posts
- 11,470
Use it, fix it, toss it... lol
If you were to come meet me in the eve,
At dusk, that hour of magical hushed fear
When moonlit fragrance softly draws so near,
To kiss, embrace me tight, and never leave
A serpent's slither with my silken hem
Gentle sway leaves a trail behind my dress
Now before it fades and the light grows dim
Follow this silent path to the cypress
If you were to come meet me in the eve,
At dusk, that hour of magical hushed fear
When moonlit fragrance softly draws so near,
To kiss, embrace me tight, and never leave
A serpent's slither with my silken hem
Gentle sway leaves a trail behind my dress
Now before it fades and the light grows dim
Follow this silent path to the cypress
REDWAVE
Urban Jungle Dweller
- Joined
- Aug 26, 2001
- Posts
- 6,013
Sonnet sluts
Ah yes, I remember fondly those sonnet sluts. They were insatiable in their fervent lust for sonnets, wanting to be penetrated by them again and again . . . Indiscrimate they were, too: they'd let any sonnet have its way with them. I remember seeing them on a sunny day, with sonnet juice all over their faces . . . Ah, where are the sonnet sluts of yesteryear?
Ah yes, I remember fondly those sonnet sluts. They were insatiable in their fervent lust for sonnets, wanting to be penetrated by them again and again . . . Indiscrimate they were, too: they'd let any sonnet have its way with them. I remember seeing them on a sunny day, with sonnet juice all over their faces . . . Ah, where are the sonnet sluts of yesteryear?
Lauren Hynde
Hitched
- Joined
- Apr 11, 2002
- Posts
- 21,061
Re: Use it, fix it, toss it... lol
That's the spirit! I like it. Alas, you didn't follow the ABBA ABBA rhyme! I suppose I could settle for ABBA CDDC, though... Do you want to rearrange the verses to comply to this?WickedEve said:
WickedEve
save an apple, eat eve
- Joined
- Oct 20, 2001
- Posts
- 11,470
If you were to come meet me in the eve,
At dusk, that hour of magical hushed fear
When moonlit fragrance softly draws so near,
To kiss, embrace me tight, and never leave
A serpent's slither with my silken hem
Gentle sway leaves a trail behind my dress
Follow this silent path to the cypress
Now before it fades and the light grows dim
I guess, it still work this way, doesn't it?
At dusk, that hour of magical hushed fear
When moonlit fragrance softly draws so near,
To kiss, embrace me tight, and never leave
A serpent's slither with my silken hem
Gentle sway leaves a trail behind my dress
Follow this silent path to the cypress
Now before it fades and the light grows dim
I guess, it still work this way, doesn't it?
Lauren Hynde
Hitched
- Joined
- Apr 11, 2002
- Posts
- 21,061
That will work, Eve. We'll need to edit it a little, for iamb at least, but let's wait until someone else tries to finish this. 
And whomever it is, remember the rhyming options: CDE CDE, CCD EED or CDC DCD.
Edited to add: If you go with CDE it's pretty easy, cause you don't even have to rhyme, but it can be a little hard for the person who comes last, unless you choose words with plenty of possible rhymes...
And whomever it is, remember the rhyming options: CDE CDE, CCD EED or CDC DCD.
Edited to add: If you go with CDE it's pretty easy, cause you don't even have to rhyme, but it can be a little hard for the person who comes last, unless you choose words with plenty of possible rhymes...
Last edited:
REDWAVE
Urban Jungle Dweller
- Joined
- Aug 26, 2001
- Posts
- 6,013
Organic v. mechanical form
Actually, I like Eve's first version of the second stanza better, lol. I also like the idea of varying the rhyme scheme, rather than mechanically following a pattern. Rules are made to be broken. I will definitely try to add to this, Eve. Give me a little time to digest what's already been written.
It all comes down to the Romantic poets' conception of organic form vs. mechanical form. The Neo-Classicists of the 18th century (such as Alexander Pope) were practitioners of mechanical form, which is fixed and predetermined. The Romantics believed in organic form, which is ad hoc and individual to each work of art and grows out of it. Basically, they made up the form as they went along. Their works were not totally formless, but they had a much freer and looser form than the works of 18th century poets.
Lauren seems to be a Neo-Classicist, whereas I'm definitely a Romantic.
Actually, I like Eve's first version of the second stanza better, lol. I also like the idea of varying the rhyme scheme, rather than mechanically following a pattern. Rules are made to be broken. I will definitely try to add to this, Eve. Give me a little time to digest what's already been written.
It all comes down to the Romantic poets' conception of organic form vs. mechanical form. The Neo-Classicists of the 18th century (such as Alexander Pope) were practitioners of mechanical form, which is fixed and predetermined. The Romantics believed in organic form, which is ad hoc and individual to each work of art and grows out of it. Basically, they made up the form as they went along. Their works were not totally formless, but they had a much freer and looser form than the works of 18th century poets.
Lauren seems to be a Neo-Classicist, whereas I'm definitely a Romantic.
Lauren Hynde
Hitched
- Joined
- Apr 11, 2002
- Posts
- 21,061
This is supposed to be classicist. If you want romantic, you can start the next one!
j/k
We'll just see where this ends up, I'm not worried about that.
JUDO
Flasher
- Joined
- May 1, 2001
- Posts
- 2,240
Lauren.Hynde & WickedEve said:
Where wave on wave pounds rocks upon dark eve,
My heart entreats love's grace its claim to keep.
A sudden kiss quite soft and knife thrust deep
To take me fast on death...and never leave.
Upon my soul I swear, "Beware the mist -
Of a thousand lips that were never kissed."
- Judo
REDWAVE
Urban Jungle Dweller
- Joined
- Aug 26, 2001
- Posts
- 6,013
Clean-up batter
Lauren, you can moon me anytime. Where do you get those cutesey icons, anyway?
Here's my proposal for the finished poem (breaking all of Lauren's rules):
If you were to come meet me in the eve,
At dusk, that hour of magical hushed fear
When moonlit fragrance softly draws so near,
To kiss, embrace me tight, and never leave
A serpent's slither with my silken hem
Gentle sway leaves a trail behind my dress
Now before it fades and the light grows dim
Follow this silent path to the cypress
And yet I know that it would be a lie
So many times my heart has been betrayed
Why do I leave it open to new hurt?
I feel my breath go out upon a sigh
The question's answered soon as it is made
Better to be stabbed and bleeding, than inert
Wutta ya think? Now that's organic form for you!
Lauren, you can moon me anytime. Where do you get those cutesey icons, anyway?
Here's my proposal for the finished poem (breaking all of Lauren's rules):
If you were to come meet me in the eve,
At dusk, that hour of magical hushed fear
When moonlit fragrance softly draws so near,
To kiss, embrace me tight, and never leave
A serpent's slither with my silken hem
Gentle sway leaves a trail behind my dress
Now before it fades and the light grows dim
Follow this silent path to the cypress
And yet I know that it would be a lie
So many times my heart has been betrayed
Why do I leave it open to new hurt?
I feel my breath go out upon a sigh
The question's answered soon as it is made
Better to be stabbed and bleeding, than inert
Wutta ya think? Now that's organic form for you!
Lauren Hynde
Hitched
- Joined
- Apr 11, 2002
- Posts
- 21,061
Actually you were all terrible at it. Nobody cared to read my instructions: Eve didn't respect my rhyme, Judo decided to go with the English format instead of the classic, both Judo and Redwave wrote 2 stanzas instead of just one...
This is a tight form, how do you guys want to write a sonnet as a team if everyone pushes in a different direction?
This is a tight form, how do you guys want to write a sonnet as a team if everyone pushes in a different direction?
Lauren Hynde
Hitched
- Joined
- Apr 11, 2002
- Posts
- 21,061
take that!
Sonnet Sluts
I do remember those dear sonnet sluts:
Insatiable in their stern fervent lust,
Demanding penetration, one heavy thrust,
Repeatedly plunged, in their pussies or butts
So indiscriminate they were, the two:
Let any ol' sonnet have its way with them!
No matter how bad, they would never condemn
A well hung sonnet that they'd rather screw.
Remember seeing them, one sunny day,
With sonnet juice all over their smiling faces?
Two cuddled girls, in the park, of all places
Six, seven sonnets, worn out from the play
That's why I ask, with yearn, yes, also fear(!):
Where are the sonnet sluts of yesteryear?
Sonnet Sluts
I do remember those dear sonnet sluts:
Insatiable in their stern fervent lust,
Demanding penetration, one heavy thrust,
Repeatedly plunged, in their pussies or butts
So indiscriminate they were, the two:
Let any ol' sonnet have its way with them!
No matter how bad, they would never condemn
A well hung sonnet that they'd rather screw.
Remember seeing them, one sunny day,
With sonnet juice all over their smiling faces?
Two cuddled girls, in the park, of all places
Six, seven sonnets, worn out from the play
That's why I ask, with yearn, yes, also fear(!):
Where are the sonnet sluts of yesteryear?
Last edited:
Lauren Hynde
Hitched
- Joined
- Apr 11, 2002
- Posts
- 21,061
Stop whining! You're a whine slut!WickedEve said:Red, you're a spank slut!
Lauren, I told you I didn't want to play, but you're a pushy slut!
You're all sluts! lol
Alright, I'll go through your stanzas and try to make something solid out of these amalgamation of sluts.
JUDO
Flasher
- Joined
- May 1, 2001
- Posts
- 2,240
Re: take that!
23rd Century Sonic Sluts!
Downshift your gaze. Don't dwell upon our might.
Your puny sluts of yesteryear are gone.
Their crown's too small to fit, so chrome we don.
Our armor's thick - our bodies curve just right.
Fusioned tools of tomorrow's dawn burn deep
As ardor's rev doth climb and start the fun.
We jack into our Xbox Playstation -
As artificial sex abounds, we beep.
Thick cocks, wet cunts, stiff nipples to the hilt,
Our every hole grants access for the game.
In ending toll, the highest score gets fame.
If our thrashing's great, we win though we Tilt!
Our quest for O's has never been higher
While Sonic, Mario and Kong...sire.
Lauren.Hynde said:
23rd Century Sonic Sluts!
Downshift your gaze. Don't dwell upon our might.
Your puny sluts of yesteryear are gone.
Their crown's too small to fit, so chrome we don.
Our armor's thick - our bodies curve just right.
Fusioned tools of tomorrow's dawn burn deep
As ardor's rev doth climb and start the fun.
We jack into our Xbox Playstation -
As artificial sex abounds, we beep.
Thick cocks, wet cunts, stiff nipples to the hilt,
Our every hole grants access for the game.
In ending toll, the highest score gets fame.
If our thrashing's great, we win though we Tilt!
Our quest for O's has never been higher
While Sonic, Mario and Kong...sire.
Last edited:
REDWAVE
Urban Jungle Dweller
- Joined
- Aug 26, 2001
- Posts
- 6,013
Synergy
This whole thing illustrates the synergistic effect we seem to have on each other. A passing remark by Eve leads me to write a post expanding on it, which in turn inspires Lauren to write a poem, which then sends Judo spinning off into futuristic porn-- tomorrow's smut today!
Eve, you're the mother of all sluts.
This whole thing illustrates the synergistic effect we seem to have on each other. A passing remark by Eve leads me to write a post expanding on it, which in turn inspires Lauren to write a poem, which then sends Judo spinning off into futuristic porn-- tomorrow's smut today!
Eve, you're the mother of all sluts.
WickedEve
save an apple, eat eve
- Joined
- Oct 20, 2001
- Posts
- 11,470
Re: Synergy
Shucks, Red. All this flattery still ain't gonna get my lips wrapped around your... ummm... what do you call it? My mind's a blank.REDWAVE said:This whole thing illustrates the synergistic effect we seem to have on each other. A passing remark by Eve leads me to write a post expanding on it, which in turn inspires Lauren to write a poem, which then sends Judo spinning off into futuristic porn-- tomorrow's smut today!
Eve, you're the mother of all sluts.
Lauren Hynde
Hitched
- Joined
- Apr 11, 2002
- Posts
- 21,061
Re: Re: take that!
Not only am I submitting my slutty sonnet, I'll be forced to add a link to Judo's sluts... Futuristic cybersluts are taking over the world.JUDO said:
REDWAVE
Urban Jungle Dweller
- Joined
- Aug 26, 2001
- Posts
- 6,013
Now wait a minute!
Lauren, since you're slutty sonnet incorporated several phrases from my post, and was obviously based on it, I should get co-authorship credits!
LOL, Eve. What is that damn thing called? Well, anyway, don't worry about that. Just close your eyes and open your mouth, and maybe the name will pop into your mind.
Lauren, since you're slutty sonnet incorporated several phrases from my post, and was obviously based on it, I should get co-authorship credits!
LOL, Eve. What is that damn thing called? Well, anyway, don't worry about that. Just close your eyes and open your mouth, and maybe the name will pop into your mind.
Similar threads
