Evil_Geoff
Equal Opportunity Sadist
- Joined
- Aug 23, 2005
- Posts
- 6,375
The Evil Empire® Needs You!
With the departure of Tall Amy and slavemike, the leaders of the Evil Empire® have an opening or two for eager minions with a burning desire to serve. *Please note that is a "burning desire to serve", not a desire to serve up some burning! That comes later. AFTER the pillaging.* The position of Evil Puppet® has been filled, thanks everyone for your interest. ;-)
But we still need minions!
Plotting World Domination while maintaining a full time work schedule and full time college class load takes a lot out of an Evil Mastermind and his Wicked, Mean, and Nasty consort, so we are looking for help around the Top-Secret Supreme World Headquarters of The Evil Empire®. Specific duties are negotiable. But things that we need help with include typical headquarters and training ground maintenance things like uniform care, mess hall duties, chemical warfare agent dispersion, keeping free-fire zones clear of tall grass that infiltrators can hide in, etc. Useful skill sets would include plant identification and eradication, small arms and appliance operations, close quarters room clearing, and a variety of chemical warfare application skills is highly valued (especially the proper application of defoliants and surficants [and knowing the DIFFERENCE between where and how to use them]...).
Please be aware that initially this will NOT be a paid or 24/7 live-in opportunity. Compensation is negotiable however, and that could include time in The Information Extraction Center. *Calling it a dungeon is just sooooooo passe'.* Tori and I both give classes in a wide variety of torture techniques and we like to keep in practice. ;-) Which reminds me, Emergency Contacts and Next of Kin information might be useful for us to have. Just sayin'. And IF you survive the first 6 months this could turn into a permanent gig.
Where was I? Oh yes... Anyway, our class schedule takes us to a variety of locations and if you enjoy travel this could be a great opportunity for you to be a demo doll, and to network and expand your opportunities to infiltrate other subversive organizations! While performing headquarters duties, room and board will be provided, we have guest quarters that minions can use. Be advised that Tori and I did not spend 2 million years evolving to be the most dangerous predators on the planet just to eat the stuff food eats, so meat of many varieties will be on the menu. But the The Evil Empire® embraces a policy of cultural diversity so we do provide a wide variety of menu options that include meat free choices. We embrace the cuisines of many world regions, you never know when you might have to wine and dine a Head of State or the leader of an international cartel. Can't be pulling a "Busharoo" when the head of a Yakuza family is making a courtesy call, or you are negotiating with the head of the Hashashiyyin...
Tori and I have been around the block a few times, no falling for assassination attempts by seduction for us! *insert Vincent Price laugh from the "Thriller" video here...* Please understand that Tori and I don't rule out the possibility of turning minions into personal sex slaves, but really, we enjoy each others company and we are not looking for a mythical (or real for that matter) unicorn to toss in the sack. Though that could possibly come with time, trust, mutual attraction and agreement (and suitable biological and chemical contamination free certifications). Really.
We are looking for service, not sex.
Therefore, age, race, gender, orientation, and other such concerns are non-issues for us. What ARE issues are things like overall compatibility, humor, communication, openness, promptness, and location. If you don't live within a 2 - 3 hour drive of Greensboro, NC, please, don't waste your time our ours. The physical ability to perform the services needed and the ability to traverse stairs would be good too. The Top-Secret Supreme World Headquarters of The Evil Empire® is a spacious location on 3 levels (the Daily Operations Center, Mess Hall, Rec Room and Primary Communications Hub is on the ground floor, the Design and Fabrication Office, Information Extraction Office and the Guest Quarters are in the Arie, Maintenance and Storage are in the subterranean level.), but we keep elevators out of the equation so no getting trapped and killed by cutting the elevator cables for us!
Please understand that The Evil Empire® is in fact ruled by She Who Must Be Obeyed - Spaat, *and it is pronounced SP-hot, but the h is pretty much silent. It is NOT said - "sp-AT"!* Empress of All - and Tori and I are Senior Management. So if you have a cat allergy this might not be the right position for you. Unless you enjoy being humiliated by the cat and shed on and that sort of thing. If Tori or I tell you one thing and Spaat says different, take care of her first... Then get back to whatever it was Tori and I told you to do. Otherwise the consequences could be...
Severe.
Anyway, that's enough about us. You can find us at various Greensboro Floating Munch functions, Tarheel Leather Club meetings and other events around the Carolinas and Southern Virginia. If this sounds remotely like your cup of tea, drop me or Tori a few lines. We are on fetlife (me - Evil_Geoff, her - _MsTori_, She Who Must Be Obeyed - Spaat), email me here on Lit or drop us a note there on FetLife.
The Evil Empire® prides itself on being an Equal Opportunity Environment, but seriously, this isn't a position for just anyone. Lazy fuckers, psychotic bitches, drama llamas, out of work actors and double naught spies, and *HEROES* (especially heroes with cute SO's!) NEED NOT APPLY. Unless you can provide certification that you've gone to the Dark Side. We're cool with that.
The line starts to the right, no pushing or shoving, Klingon promotional techniques are not to be used prior to selection since it would reduce the pool of applicants. Thank you for your cooperation.
- Geoff
With the departure of Tall Amy and slavemike, the leaders of the Evil Empire® have an opening or two for eager minions with a burning desire to serve. *Please note that is a "burning desire to serve", not a desire to serve up some burning! That comes later. AFTER the pillaging.* The position of Evil Puppet® has been filled, thanks everyone for your interest. ;-)
But we still need minions!
Plotting World Domination while maintaining a full time work schedule and full time college class load takes a lot out of an Evil Mastermind and his Wicked, Mean, and Nasty consort, so we are looking for help around the Top-Secret Supreme World Headquarters of The Evil Empire®. Specific duties are negotiable. But things that we need help with include typical headquarters and training ground maintenance things like uniform care, mess hall duties, chemical warfare agent dispersion, keeping free-fire zones clear of tall grass that infiltrators can hide in, etc. Useful skill sets would include plant identification and eradication, small arms and appliance operations, close quarters room clearing, and a variety of chemical warfare application skills is highly valued (especially the proper application of defoliants and surficants [and knowing the DIFFERENCE between where and how to use them]...).
Please be aware that initially this will NOT be a paid or 24/7 live-in opportunity. Compensation is negotiable however, and that could include time in The Information Extraction Center. *Calling it a dungeon is just sooooooo passe'.* Tori and I both give classes in a wide variety of torture techniques and we like to keep in practice. ;-) Which reminds me, Emergency Contacts and Next of Kin information might be useful for us to have. Just sayin'. And IF you survive the first 6 months this could turn into a permanent gig.
Where was I? Oh yes... Anyway, our class schedule takes us to a variety of locations and if you enjoy travel this could be a great opportunity for you to be a demo doll, and to network and expand your opportunities to infiltrate other subversive organizations! While performing headquarters duties, room and board will be provided, we have guest quarters that minions can use. Be advised that Tori and I did not spend 2 million years evolving to be the most dangerous predators on the planet just to eat the stuff food eats, so meat of many varieties will be on the menu. But the The Evil Empire® embraces a policy of cultural diversity so we do provide a wide variety of menu options that include meat free choices. We embrace the cuisines of many world regions, you never know when you might have to wine and dine a Head of State or the leader of an international cartel. Can't be pulling a "Busharoo" when the head of a Yakuza family is making a courtesy call, or you are negotiating with the head of the Hashashiyyin...
Tori and I have been around the block a few times, no falling for assassination attempts by seduction for us! *insert Vincent Price laugh from the "Thriller" video here...* Please understand that Tori and I don't rule out the possibility of turning minions into personal sex slaves, but really, we enjoy each others company and we are not looking for a mythical (or real for that matter) unicorn to toss in the sack. Though that could possibly come with time, trust, mutual attraction and agreement (and suitable biological and chemical contamination free certifications). Really.
We are looking for service, not sex.
Therefore, age, race, gender, orientation, and other such concerns are non-issues for us. What ARE issues are things like overall compatibility, humor, communication, openness, promptness, and location. If you don't live within a 2 - 3 hour drive of Greensboro, NC, please, don't waste your time our ours. The physical ability to perform the services needed and the ability to traverse stairs would be good too. The Top-Secret Supreme World Headquarters of The Evil Empire® is a spacious location on 3 levels (the Daily Operations Center, Mess Hall, Rec Room and Primary Communications Hub is on the ground floor, the Design and Fabrication Office, Information Extraction Office and the Guest Quarters are in the Arie, Maintenance and Storage are in the subterranean level.), but we keep elevators out of the equation so no getting trapped and killed by cutting the elevator cables for us!
Please understand that The Evil Empire® is in fact ruled by She Who Must Be Obeyed - Spaat, *and it is pronounced SP-hot, but the h is pretty much silent. It is NOT said - "sp-AT"!* Empress of All - and Tori and I are Senior Management. So if you have a cat allergy this might not be the right position for you. Unless you enjoy being humiliated by the cat and shed on and that sort of thing. If Tori or I tell you one thing and Spaat says different, take care of her first... Then get back to whatever it was Tori and I told you to do. Otherwise the consequences could be...
Severe.
Anyway, that's enough about us. You can find us at various Greensboro Floating Munch functions, Tarheel Leather Club meetings and other events around the Carolinas and Southern Virginia. If this sounds remotely like your cup of tea, drop me or Tori a few lines. We are on fetlife (me - Evil_Geoff, her - _MsTori_, She Who Must Be Obeyed - Spaat), email me here on Lit or drop us a note there on FetLife.
The Evil Empire® prides itself on being an Equal Opportunity Environment, but seriously, this isn't a position for just anyone. Lazy fuckers, psychotic bitches, drama llamas, out of work actors and double naught spies, and *HEROES* (especially heroes with cute SO's!) NEED NOT APPLY. Unless you can provide certification that you've gone to the Dark Side. We're cool with that.
The line starts to the right, no pushing or shoving, Klingon promotional techniques are not to be used prior to selection since it would reduce the pool of applicants. Thank you for your cooperation.
- Geoff
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