KillerMuffin
Seraphically Disinclined
- Joined
- Jul 29, 2000
- Posts
- 25,603
{Note from the present moderator, pure, 2-2005
WHAT IS THIS THREAD
This thread will serve as a queue and a place to conduct the business of the Story Discussion Circle. It contains pages from two to end [now 2-05] of the parent thread. I am archiving the first pages in a separate thread labeled as such, 'sticky' three.
For a description of how the Story Disc. Circle is presently run, winter, 2004-5, see the second, 'sticky' thread, "What's going on at the Story Disc. Circle? Information...."
Originally posted by the_bragis
I?ve branch off from the weird but not so wonderful stuff I usually write. My latest effort is in the Loving Wives category. It?s called John and Katie ? Birthday Surprise.
I?m particularly interested in feedback regarding the following:
If you weren?t reading it to give feedback, would you have read it to the end?
I didn?t include a whole lot of physical detail. Originally John, the male character, had a beard and hairy chest. I love big hairy men, but then not all women do. The female character was blonde with green eyes and gorgeous big tits, because I?m two out of three of those. But then I decided I wanted to leave a little of that blank for the reader to fill in. Did this work?
Did you find the sex scenes easy to follow? Three isn't always easy you know?
Sure this isn?t the kind of thing that might happen often, if at all, but did it still feel ?real? in your mind? Did the dialog and actions feel natural?
When you had finished reading it, did you have a smile on your face?
Finally, I had the final edit on this story, so please any little ?o?s you may find are mine, not Bridget?s.
John and Katie - Birthday Surprise
Thank you,
Alex(fem).
WHAT IS THIS THREAD
This thread will serve as a queue and a place to conduct the business of the Story Discussion Circle. It contains pages from two to end [now 2-05] of the parent thread. I am archiving the first pages in a separate thread labeled as such, 'sticky' three.
For a description of how the Story Disc. Circle is presently run, winter, 2004-5, see the second, 'sticky' thread, "What's going on at the Story Disc. Circle? Information...."
Originally posted by the_bragis
I?ve branch off from the weird but not so wonderful stuff I usually write. My latest effort is in the Loving Wives category. It?s called John and Katie ? Birthday Surprise.
I?m particularly interested in feedback regarding the following:
If you weren?t reading it to give feedback, would you have read it to the end?
I didn?t include a whole lot of physical detail. Originally John, the male character, had a beard and hairy chest. I love big hairy men, but then not all women do. The female character was blonde with green eyes and gorgeous big tits, because I?m two out of three of those. But then I decided I wanted to leave a little of that blank for the reader to fill in. Did this work?
Did you find the sex scenes easy to follow? Three isn't always easy you know?
Sure this isn?t the kind of thing that might happen often, if at all, but did it still feel ?real? in your mind? Did the dialog and actions feel natural?
When you had finished reading it, did you have a smile on your face?
Finally, I had the final edit on this story, so please any little ?o?s you may find are mine, not Bridget?s.
John and Katie - Birthday Surprise
Thank you,
Alex(fem).
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