New Poetry Recommendations

Poems 1/20

Here be Thursday, and my pick's for the day. Not all that many posme today, this is basically a third of the ones that were there. Which means that percentage-wise it's was a pretty good poetry day on Lit. :)


~~~~~

Ghost of a Chance by Angeline
If you ever want a poet chasing ghosts, you'd better call Angeline, she seems to have the right kind of determination for it. Here is a poem that breathes on it's own, a warm and wonderful homage to...someone who I have no idea who it is, but that doesn't make the poem any less for me.


Blue Heron by My Erotic Tale
Here is a stunning serene and majestic piece of nature poetry. It deserved to be read carefully.
[color=009911]Permanent perch on a lone stump mid river
black and still as a statue
wisdom waiting with it's beak to the east[/color]


looking for god by WickedEve
Eve is looking for god with lines that would make every suitable and unsuitable candidate in the hemisphere stand to attention.
[color=009911]not in high ceiling frescoes
but in faces of men
who are raw without divinity,
their presence earthly
with no heavenly arms about them.[/color]


Pink by microwave oeuvren
If you are to make a sexy, tongue in cheek poem, and you absolutely have to rhyme it, you'd better do it damn well. like this poem does. :)
[color=009911]Watch his lingering look be smitten by your underwear
(or tuft of hair)
Electrify his skin with gentle touches from your hands
and give commands
Seer his burning soul by cooing awful things you’ll do
before you’re through[/color]


Snow At Moon by neonurotic
Neon captures a magic moment in his trademark way - with few and basic, but very well chosen words.
[color=009911]Lacy white,
old fashioned
paper cut-out flakes.[/color]


Chain Grabbed by sensuall
This kind of graphic and direct (dare I say it, yes i do) porn poem usually has me looking the other way, but there is no way of ignoring the fact that the poem is very very well written. For those that enjoys the theme and in-your-face descriptions, this is as fine as it gets.



--[EOF]--
 
friday 1/21

I waited to see if more were going to show up but...
No dice

As always what follows are my opinions only and in no way should be construed as having any relevance to anything at all.

( also the thermometer is set at 1/2 by default on my comments)

Seventeen Seconds - Truth Serum

Truth Serum are two creative souls under one banner,

I was going to suggest a " ghost" writer but no one would have laughed.

There are some really good exchanges here..
ex:
~Seventeen seconds
...to petals, perfume, a song, a silhouette.
Long and lovely, her beauty filled him,
stilled him. Her voice filled, stilled the room:
boundaries
"Je vous ai attendu toute ma vie"

...as if understood, as if timbre wasn't enough~

Some verses work better than others but the verses that Do work have a longing,almost hypnotic feel to them.
I hope this duo writes more, explores a little, takes a few chances.
the chemistry is there it just needs to be blended a bit more
have a look


Dingly Dell - Man Ray

I loved this except for one thing...the lines seemed too long.
If it was intentional I'd ask about the reason..all I can think of is perhaps not wanting it to fall into a typical sing song rhythm.
But to MY ear..it's perfect for it.
It's a Nursery rhyme and an old Irish song all wrapped into one
with a bit of naughty throw in.
ex:

But lecherous old codgers will comment on how you look so well,
dressed in your little skirts and tight tops, so out of place in Dingly Dell.

All the village men lust for you, their libidos they struggle to quell,
as they talk about you, `the posh bird` who lives in Dingly Dell.

I'd love to see it split up..maybe a little work on syllable count to really tighten it up..
But I also like it just the way it is.
Nice job



Nightime Flutterbys - Anne22

This has a great rhythm, some wonderful rhymes and is a really good read.
it is deceptively simple, but read it a few times and it's got a Poe like sway..it's draws you in (I kept hearing " Annabel Lee)
The language is neither to sweet or too cliché'
it is a nice balance of style and image and rhythm.
I hope to see more from this poet



Winter's Sorrow -stacistatas

~Like a child
chiding me
To leave my chair
to help with flowerets
For her hair~

This poem has a deep feeling of sadness yet ends on a note of hope.
Some very nice imagery also
The above verse is my favorite...have a look


examining words - Wicked Eve

~the rip is subtle
quieter than a surgeon
who enters with
options~

I mean...who doesn't wish they had written that verse??

and who else would be composing poetry while waiting for the doctor.
Despite what she may think..I think Ms Eve is a wonderful poet
and it's verses like that ...that confirm my judgment.
always worth reading...have a look.

That's it for me
Twas an easy day for me...or perhaps people are avoiding my reviewing day
; )
In either case read them all, make your own recommendations, judge for yourselves, vote, and let the poets know you are reading them

have a good weekend all
stay warm
Go Pats

:rose:
 
Another interesting poem today...

In a unique crotch-centric view of the solar system, Quasar seems to find the universe between the legs with Orrery . Full of consonance and assonance he spins a short, but fun tale of the far beyond... or perhaps something much closer to home.

Read this one... you'll finish the poem dancing.


jim : )
 
new poems reviews

New Poems Reviews for Saturday 22, 2005

Morning, My first Saturday off in quite awhile ...
and I admit I love sittin' back with my coffee and
reading poems to start my day so I'm in heaven ...
okay Texas but close enough <snicker>

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Master by silverthorn

clip~
He feels a hunger….
It comes from within… He struggles with good and evil and with honor… just as all men do He feels bound to be and do…


I enjoyed the way this was laid out, unique!
and the discription of the inner desires was awesome
very vivid, not the usual BDSM poem, very nice.

also posted today by this poet ...
His Power
&
Day Dreams

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I Adore ... by petalsonfire

clip~
I will wait,
at heavens gate,
and still never
get enough.
Or maybe i`ll be
at the gate of hades,
for either would
be a pleasure,
as long as your
lips and tongue
stay attached, to
my hidden treasure.


my pedals on fire now, this was a cute read,
erotic poetry, very good, and humorous yet
serious, the uncertain destination up or down
was delighted with the passion of the wanting <grin>

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Drink Up by Substance

clip~
I poured my hear out
She pored over my words
Perhaps thinking, "Poor boy,
so desperate to love..."

WELL ... this is exactly how I was trying to describe
an emotion last night matter of fact and had inspired
a poem I will write in the near future but this said it
best ...
clip~
Better to let the fruits of emotion
wither and die on the vine?
Unrequited,
unfinished,
as unfermented wine

I know this feeling oh so well, a very witty and
heartfelt poem.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Haiku 9 by Du Lac

clip~
Crystallized tears roar
Lonely heart cries out for more
Owls patient virtue

Du Lac has a series of Haiku poems in this post,
3 to be exact. A very clever and awesome Haiku
nobody does Haiku like Du~
this was very very good and also posted was
Haiku 10

another powerful series of three Haiku poems to set
your heart a wirl~ thanks Du (~_*)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

black water by alby-writing poems (seranade)

clip~
A potion for the awakening
a serum for the craver
Texas mud, Java's black water

coffee


as I drink my brew and read this I can't help
but savor the moment, nice poem alby a brother ...
alby around, alby a reading your poems bro~
'lil tip, this poet is an awesome song writer' <grin>
an a hell of a musician~ and a darn good poet~
(~_*)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Orrery by quasar

clip~
mere balls encircling
balanced in swing
ovals around outskirted ovals

Orrery Orrery
mezmerizing


I admit I had to look up this word <snicker>
very nice and very clever to make such a tool
erotic, very nicely done. : )

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

take what I offer by annaswirls

clip~
If something must be sacrificied
let it be my flesh
stretched and skybound
let your mouth taste pain from every pore


ana casts an enchanting spell with words and
this poem shines today with her witty words
and wonderful way, a zen master of poetry
at work here.

crossing

clip~
tell me.
why does it take so long
to let me take your hand,
translate my meaning and intent?

awesome concept, very clever topic and an
even nicer solution <grinin'>

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Oasis by traibreamhIon

clip~
Sand morphs to water
They take it in
Quenching their souls deepest thirst
Making a single paradise surrounded by an ocean of coarse unrelenting, sand

excellent poem, clever thought ... an Oasis
of a read! <grin>
also posted by this poet ...
I want
&
rain


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
HOT POEM
defrosting a frozen soul by Super_Genius

clip~
finally, you give me my exquisite release
propelling your engorged phallus into me
stretching me almost painfully yet sating my desires
as our lovemaking intensifies, passions building


I always wanted to read a poem by
a Super Genius to see how they
would write as a lesson ... now I know!
very nice erotic poem

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Empty Mirrors by duckiesmut

clip~
And ill-bent envy
For something more
Than what we know,
For something real
That doesn't grow
In plastic boxes
Pretty pictures,
Shiny toys
And empty mirrors.

a very engenius poem

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hester Prynne by arienette

clip~
Let us mark the letter "D" for "Doe"
In place of our hearts
And we'll go from there.

You weren't lying when you said
Love drops like an atom bomb.

I like that Idea~ <grinin'>
went dear hunting myself last night <bigger grin>
got me a doe~
anyway this was a very good poem filled with
some wonderful lines and meanings. Inspirational (obviously) <snicker>

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

For Steve by lindiana

clip~
*kiss*
it is this
my love is growing
and you
my love know it
you
my life
my love
my bliss


a nice poem directed towards a love,
nice especially with valentines day coming <smile>

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Cumberland Mills Cockatoos by jd4george

clip~
Good fighter
Good fighter
Aren’t they pretty birds


I always love this poets wit and way with words
very unique and entertaining. as always jd4george
tantalizes us again with this wonderful and clever
write about cock ... attoos <grin

also posted by jd4george
Tarot Reading
I loved this poem ... Templeminded reads tarot and I
just invisioned this picture so very well with this
descriptive poem, excellent reading and a lesson
in describing an object, person place and thing
very very good poem~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hatred by Remec

clip~
Cars pulling out
when the road is clear
to the horizon behind you


Remec had on a thinking cap with this poem
excellent delivery and gripping topic, loved the ending
excellent poem~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

little girl by sack

clip~
(dedicated to Hally B., 1997-2005...rest in peace, little one!)

I believe sack is excercising being vague
an endearing poem with a dedication as such~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A Poem for my Girl ...#7 by Man Ray

clip~
Tell me, is the above desire weird or just plain funny?


cute poem~
a list of poems for a loved one, nice touch

also posted was #8 and I wish

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

swings by wolfbane

clip~
Of course when we decide to stop, we let our feet slide through the sand a few times...leaving our lines on the surface below us...and when we stop, it's our footprints...side by side...that will greet the next swinger.



another words of wisdom poem
very nice indeed, a great look at
the swings of time and soul <grin>

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Trolly Trolly by Uncle Pervey

clip~
Trolly has a Need to Correct others,
And don't care if it's Sisters or Brothers.
What Trolly loves to do is masturbate,
While criticising and expressing hate!



Uncle Pervey's poetic nature shines here~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

the list was long but a delight~
please leave all comments on the thread ...
'...to keep the review thread clear'

thanks for the journeys
and have a great weekend~
 
All dug out ....

Okay all~~~
I am now all dug out from the blizzard took a wee nap... and will read read read.. look for the postings soon..
Du Lac
 
First set of reviews..

Okay all.. here is the first set of reviews..
My first three pics are as follows:

I am laughing because it is the first three poems listed!
Local Politics Liar

Liar!
I enjoyed this work, it ran right up my alley. Nature, politics, (intellectual jargon), with the last stanza taking a real turn on what truth really is...
QUOTE:
for fifteen years
a tree stood sentry
patient witness
to little bipeds
with funny cat-calls

here I find it interesting that you reflect on time in the human sense. Speaking of a tree limiting its time on this earth.. like the only importance of its exhistance was that 15 years... makes me go hmmmmm... oh really... and how many others may have noticed this tree and thought the same thing...

and there stood the tree
silently swaying limbs
to a different tune
than our human chatter
to no consensus, to no end
for fifteen years of ndecision

again..repeated thought.. on the 15 years...
but here... I love the change... no longer giving importance to the 15 years.. but rather.. all of time..and what really matters...the roots...makes me think of my own life and how I am living...do I have strong roots.. or are they too close to the ground level.. there fore vulnerabel and exposed to giving a damn....
Quote:
as if they could wind up some DeLorean,
take a wayback spin

as if roots
would really
give a damn

Thank you Du Lac

Glass Moon anaswirls

Ana..

This really struck me hard:
quote:
You poets, prophets, philosophers
will know soon enough
why guess?
just live

This is so simple and so right. The flow as I read it out loud soothed my soul and opened my mind.. ty for the read and the mirror

My Life Jaded Poet

I only use strong language to express myself when nothing else works... After reading this poem I wanted to f___ing hate it. But I found such riveting truth in the lines and a total honesty of when one is lost within the inbetween of living that I have to say I really liked this dark look at ones life. The hopelessness spoke to me, been there done that... grateful not to be there... A suggested read..

Okay more to come..back to reading..
Du Lac:devil:
 
Final poems..

Okay here are the rest all...

Cast Aside Krenna Smart

Haunting..this was a haunting taunt of moments... looking at things cast away that we allow to sit in the shadows of living..used up, ignored.. only to see value when we cast our eyes away from the obvious and learn to breath again.

I hate waiting tungtied2u

I liked the simplicity of the stanzas and rhetoric in this poem... the simple complexity of love and hate.. desire and need.. good work

Comprehend stacistatas

just read it~ I liked the style and the subject...

also a good read by the same author is:
The conversation

Being Single Templeminded

I enjoyed this work.. the contrasts and the use of more than one perspective on a tender "social" dilemna.. I very much felt the twisting in the following:
quote:
As for me I say, it has it's ups as well as it's downs
You have your times of smiles, and sometimes of frowns
When we are newborns, there is always someone close by
Some of us get use to that, and want it till we die

Powerful this last line...
thank you for the write..

Sightless Eyes Blackbeards Ghost
quote:
The streets of you are now my home
And I no longer shall go to roam
Forever yours
Forever lost
Forever to dream with you

I dreamy look into becoming lost within another... I enjoyed the simple complexity of the write..


Serendipity Erotic Tale

.I saw the women.. the princes.. the tears trailing behind them as an ocean filled with fish that opened their legs for these three... hence brail:
One of several small ropes attached to the leech of a sail for drawing the sail in or up.
A small net for drawing fish from a trap or a larger net into a boat
hmmm makes me think.. Serendipity... so many fish in the net of lust..which one slides through the net of love and passion to : (ps.. it goes both ways.. gender wise lol...)
quote:
Till they found a woman that was pleasing
then they claimed her and called it ... Serendipity!
Nice write..

So all there you go.. alot of good reading out there..Remember we learn from each other so go read comment and learn!

Blessings
Du Lac:heart:
 
There was a new poem on Saturday

That I thought was worth a second look. I think often times subtlety is mistaken for being vague, but in this case the subtle presentation is anything but vague. Sack's little girl could have slipped and become an overtly sentimental poem, but he deftly remained aloof, allowing the reader to enter the poem though his images.

I was a bit torn about the ending, initially hating it, then conversely, loving it, then hating it and finally loving it again. Everyone should go read the poem and decide... did the ending get too sentimental, should he have ended the poem earlier, or should he have ended it like he did? I think by just considering the alternatives Sack had and how he decided to end the poem is a lesson in poetry we can all benefit by.

Here is the first two stanzas:

"impressions in sand
a shiny ring
petals of a dandelion

you were there...

silky pink gloves
a doll that sleeps
Lion King lunchbox

you were there..."


The refrain is haunting isn't it?

Read the poem... you'll feel it, truely.


jim : )
 
Monday's reviews...again, just my thoughts. Please feel free to add on as you like. :)

Three servings from foehn today, all of which I enjoyed but the last is my favorite:

You Said You Hated Cooking

Prayer of a Fish

Late Correspondence

I like the repetition of "night" in the first line, serving both as a reminder and an introduction. The language usage is stunning. It reaches for the reader's emotional response without taking a step into sentimentality. Very well done.

Ice Sculpture
by:Middleagepoet

Blue lipped, frosted face
you sparkle in the wind
still whispering to me
as I slowly, slowly sink
beneath the ice, beneath your kiss.

The almost lyrical use of language made me catch and hold my breath.

Happy reading. :)
 
A quick mention...

I didn't get to read a lot of the new poems, but I found Nylon by MaxiFree4 incredibly erotic. Perhaps it was the "arched architecture" but he created an image that I will see long into the night. This poem is simply an erotic sculpture in words... read it and enjoy.


jim : )


PS: Also in a more somber poem, take a look at Foehn's Late Correspondence and you'll see why Duckiesmut recommended it. When you read it, see how he uses the free form of the poem to create the very emotion he writes about. Read it and feel.
 
Tuesdays Reviews.... Part 1

Okay.... heres the first delivery of Tuesday the 25th of January's New Poem reviews. Please bear with me as Im still trying to get the hang of the Vb Code and the urls and stuff....

I wish my bank was like Hoopers in 'An Account of Us (Sestina)' . Very clever use of the jargon, to the extent that I even had to get my dictionary out to discover the meaning of Lien. This one should have Maths teachers across the world on the edge of their seats, champing at the bit.

'The truth of us is that we own the loan
We must maintain ourselves within the sum
Careful in all regards to not subtract
Ourselves from the lovers of our pure lien;
To them we owe our love and surely add
Our learned love to them and not divide'

'Through your Eyes' by Mdnyte Shadow. A good little poem. Short and simple, but with a hidden depth and a good use of rhythm and rhyming scheme.

'Within your eyes,
Passion and fire,
Yearning and longing,
Lust filled desire.'

'This is.... for you' by Thesandman. Heartfelt and touching in its own way. Puts the themes of devotion and commitment at the fore....

'It is the trusting look in your eyes,
That gives me the greater pleasure.
It is the kiss so softly, tenderly shared,
Even as our bodies burn in rapturous desire, merged.'

'There's always Heaven' by impressive is another one to check out in my opinion. Relaxed yet direct... Subtle yet sharp. This tale of longing for a forbidden love gets my thumbs up.

'imagination unlocks
the chains of responsibility
and frees like minds
to dance in a forbidden embrace'

'Off Track' by catastrophe caught my attention also. Well written and concise and more than capable of delivering its intended imagery.

'right now I am riding a train
that appears to have
no direction
(impossible)
since straight
lines of steel set
this experience into motion'


Well.... thats the first bunch, I wanted to start off small to see if I've got the hang of the URL's etc.... theres still a lot to read through... so watch this space for the next installment. Should be in the next hour or two....
 
Thank you, Trent, for the mention. I know you're still working on today's reviews, but, if I may throw in one that I liked...

I'd like to point everyone at Maria's of tattoos, bridges, and pidgeons. This poem just struck me, an awesome title that is fulfilled by a great poem.

It begins...

Home is like a temporary tattoo,
when it's gone you remember-
it was there, on that exact spot
near the patch of freckles
on your left arm.


So there's my two cents, since I actually had a day off to read. :)
 
Tuesdays Reviews.... Part 2

Okay, heres part 2 of Tuesday 25th of January's new Poetry reviews.... hope you enjoy.

Although already mentioned by Catastrophe above, 'of Tattoos, Bridges and Pigeons' by Maria2394 also caught my eye, myself being a big fan of bridges (I live right next to one), pigeons (there like rats with wings..... great) and tattoo's (I have a few, but prefer them on the female canvas)......

Putting jokes aside however, what I found was a well worded poem with powerful emotional overtones. Although a little eclectic in timing and stanza length, it conveys the imagery and situation it intends too very well indeed (even exceptionally well).

'Home is like a temporary tattoo,
when it's gone you remember-
it was there, on that exact spot
near the patch of freckles
on your left arm.....'

Freehawks 'Words seem to fail me' may be accused by some of being somewhat generic in theme, but in delivery I find it rather refreshing. Not as wordy or esoteric as some and, although a little faltering (no pun intended), its use of a simple, almost spoken, rhtyhm serves it well. An enjoyable, if not unique, poem.

'A moment like the one we shared
In my mind, nothing could be compared
When I wasn't me, and you weren't you...
As one, we were true.'

'Wandering Thoughts' by Cavu182 caught my eye..... then I got sidetracked, but eventually came back to read it. Its quite punchy, and although it trailed a little around the fourth stanza I liked the ending.

'whose to say what goal we strive
what spark keeps our soul alive
if I knew I’d order two
one for me, and one for you…'

Another mention for Hoopers comes in the form of 'Word Beat (Sonnet)' . A commendable effort that took me back to English classes in High School and University.... except this is a little more intimate than it was in those classes.....

'Our touch not real as miles keep us not there
The grasps and gasps are tools in our rich notes
Our words cover us with warmth as we share
The ends of our firm lines gush out in quotes.'

AnnaSwirls 'Sketch of a Woman' is another piece that deserves a mention. A Tastefully written and well structured poem. Perhaps a little vague and esoteric for my usual likings, I enjoyed it none-the-less.

'You understand and display
what makes this piece alive
Not only a piece of woman
but woman condensed into one piece'


There's still a few poems I need to look through, so stay Tuned for Part 3.... which should, actually and honestly, be done in about an hour or so.
 
Wednesday 1.26.05 New Poems

Good Morning Poets

There is a handful of new poems this Wednesday morning so we all should be able to look them over, comment, and vote to support our fellow poets.

With that in mind, I have a long day with work and school so time permits just one review at the moment. Later this evening (PST) I will be back to review the rest unless someone else can find the time to review then that would be very cool :cool:

For now...



Breaking the seal by annaswirls tops the list with a tasteful (pun intended) erotic piece which gives "literal" thought to the phrase tongue in cheek with her intersexing metaphor.
Can we admit and accept
love as a perishable item?

Are you ready to break that seal?
Baby, we always looked so good behind glass.
That's it for now... be back later and have a nice day, Poets!


- neo
 
Here's one I have a feeling the reviewer might leave off of his review list later that very much needs and deserves mentioning.

Breathless Before 99 Steps
by: neonurotic

From the view point above,
sun rays slice holes into
the thick gray clouds, shining
a warm spotlight on Pacific waves,
highlighting the cold white caps.

And it just gets better. Put down your coffee, your newspaper, or your stack-o-work and take a moment to read and enjoy. :) Exhilirating use of language as expression.
 
NEW POEMS


I do not feel that this cat :catroar: gets enough play around here.

When you see the roaring pussy, it is a sign of my personal picks of the day. Which ones make your pussy roar? Let us know!


:catroar: discrimination
by catastrophe ©

The old man sits
on a metal
folding chair
protected from the
steady dripping rain
by the plastic paneled shield
that surrounds the
bodega.

I spent some quality time with this poem after work today, I hope that you do the same. It raised many questions in my mind. There is a very distinct voice in this writing and I look forward to reading more of catastrophe's poetry

....................


The rhyme fits this poem nicely.

here is a taste:

snoitcelfeR
by Thesandman ©

snoitcelfeR


"In looking back at things I've done,
Or people I have known.

I hope that hindsight marks my way
And in that I have grown "


.......................

It has been a slow day for comments. Makes me sad, although I have no right to be, most of my days are slow in commenting.

Hope you read this: Although I never saw a flippin Franklin, I felt like I had been on Washington street as well. Classic Ange with jazz sprinkled through.

:catroar: Washington Street
by Angeline ©


"On Washington Street
up the gray porch,
past the white door
with etched oval glass,
we dined in a room papered
with day-glo posters,
100 winking Ben Franklins
flipping the V in unity. "

..............................


Choose
by Substance ©



"Choose

Make a decision
Flip a coin
Draw straws
but the decision isn't
as easy as it seems"

This was a fast paced poem feeling the pressure.... choose!

not an easy thing for anyone!

............




Bee-careful
by My Erotic Tale ©


A fun poem, I love the rhythm and sound of this verse the most, it fits in with the story.

"circles red
with silver rim
no body saw him
land
then go in "

.....................

Welcome a new poet with her first poem here at lit-- a nice erotic piece. Here is a sample:

I Come Undone
by BourbonInTheBlood ©


"At the sight of you,
A million strings unwind.
I feel a tightly wrapped desire quiver,
until with one sudden breath -
I'm loosened.
My body becomes limp and heavy
with your presence.
You are my intoxication. "

........................

I agree with the three public comments on this poem. It has nuggets of beautiful phrasing throught. Go see what you think.

:catroar: reluctant lover
by bluerains ©


"careening secluded in
camouflaged fields of paradise
reposing behind layered veils
of reflection
she hears a whisper"

............................

Too short to quote, check out what he steps in...

Cast in a Negative Light
by Reltne ©

...................


If nothing else, read this today.

:catroar: Breathless Before 99 Steps
by neonurotic © :catroar:

I swear this is not some happy review exchange system, it would be my pick of the day if Don Rickles wrote it.

It it neither vague nor prescriptive. Neo finds a balance between painting a perfect picture with inventive descriptions and allowing you to come inside and paint your own.... allowing a partnership between reader and poet, even if they are strangers, still he allows us to share the intimate moment between man, woman, nature.




"From the view point above,
sun rays slice holes into
the thick gray clouds, shining
a warm spotlight on Pacific waves,
highlighting the cold white caps."

...................

These are my personal opinions, I do not have the same taste or eye as others, please post your own ideas on this thread.

Thank you for the chance to read your poems today! What a wonderful time to be a poet!


Sorry if my roaring pussy offends anyone, sometimes she just wants to be seen



:catroar:
 
1/28 Friday reviews

it's 19 degrees in Massachusetts and I am equalizing my internal temperature to the external temperature by drinking cold beer.
Please keep that in mind as you read the reviews.
as always the opinions expressed here are my own based on my limited knowledge of poetry and freudian symbolism. There is a distinct possibility that I just don't " get it"

{ and the thermometer is left at 50 on my remarks only}

And there's the bell...


Enola Gay - annaswirls

despite some apparent historical inaccuracies which I was able to over look this is a powerful poem in many ways.
The illustration is stark and unfeeling..
Just a glimpse of steel, cold, inhuman, old.
there are some great images
ex:
~Back home, steady fingers
of their mothers and lovers
paint night-flight control dials
with glowing green uranium ink.~

That I can see very clearly..
and this:
~Boys are coming home!
greeted by sterile wives and lovers
with their pre-cancerous lipstick kisses. ~

there is something there that almost sums up the whole cold war...for me anyway.
A worthwhile read as always.


~
stray - wicked eve

another illustrated poem.
and oddly enough, being placed under anna's, it looks to me like Japanese school children walking home.
The poem itself seems to speak of the one individual who, though he seems like all the others, find beauty in what others find a nuisance.
one of Eve's more subtle ( not vague) efforts


inheritance - annaswirls

oh I love this.
having felt the same things and had the same heights i was thrilled someone finally put it intro words.
the child has no fear..sees the world as a playground.
as parents we worry and fret and forget when we crossed streams on wobbly rocks or scaled trees to unsafe heights.
it's hard to keep our fears to ourselves and let " kids be kids"
anna expresses this wonderfully with yet another illustrated poem

back after lunch.....

McDonalds..I can hear my arteries squeeking...


I Dreamed You Came To My Bed - foehn

a really good idea that suffers from, in my opinion awkward phrasing.
There are some wonderful thoughts and images..but a few different word choices and a little editing would have helped this be a little more...well....dreamlike.
the first verse is my favorite:

~I slept, last night, with the front door unlocked.
Didn’t mean to. It just slipped my mind.
I also left a light on in the kitchen,
which may have had an effect: I dreamed that you
opened the door and gazed in on my form.~

Almost by accident..is what comes to mind
and it's a great set up..
I'd love to see it trimmed down to a more flowing structure .
this was a great line also:

~as you touched my face and whispered some unknowns
that stayed in the dream. All of it was kind,
I know that much.~

even changing that last line to " this much I know" would, again to me, seem a little more fluid.
all in all a very good idea and worth a read.




God - TornValentine

This is this poets first poem and it has a lot of promise.
I like the idea and some phrases are presented well.

It straddles the fence a little between being very erotic and almost holding back
I think that a little more subtle approach might draw the reader in more.
I liked the religious references however and this verse

~I want to know God,
I want to know why I belong to You,
And why this cross around my neck,
Chains me to you, and makes You mine.~

Presents a wonderful view of the duality of religion and , indeed, the dom/ sub relationships in general.

The one weak area is the last verse which is just a tad cliche..and I know because I've done it myself and had rejection letters that stated " The end was too " everybody lived happily ever after"
All in all a very good first effort and I hope this poets sticks around and learns and polishes her work.
It could be very good

and finally


Unmask the Gray - neonurotic

Another illustrated poem
and the words and picture blend perfectly.
my favorite line:

~ Fear forbids the curious only for so long...~

highly recommended read..it says much more than it seems to..

that's it for me
back to the beer and loud music

Feel free to mention anything I didn't or even to mention something I did.

have a good weekend all

:rose:
 
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Thursday's reviews.

I think i'm gpnna have to give up regular reviewing like this for a while. It seems like I can never remember when it's my day. :rolleyes:

I'll just get on with it then, shall I?


First of all stacistatas gets an honorable mention for the best use in a poem for the word "kersplatt". Day Dream is a quick and fun read, but with a biting edge below. Don't miss it.


Bluerains shows us the fangs, and paints a sexy vampire scene in curtains drawn. Very well written with an touch of eriticism by association. Very nice.


Through the summer wide window by Amberley offers a view of the changes of season, focusing on really cool little details of change.
[color=00aa00]A lone duck quacks in disgust, at
no longer being fed stale bread[/color]



To be continued... gatta get me some coffee..
 
new poems reviews

New Poems Reviews for Saturday 29, 2005

Thank you Eve and thank you 'The Poets'
for allowing me to read and comment
'my opinion' on the new poems posted
this Saturday, in no way does my opinion
reflect the thoughts and opinions of others,
they are souly my own and with that said ...
here's what I think!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Never Brought To Mind by champagne1982

clip~
Young men of a certain age
are putty in my hands.
My look or glance or fluttering finger
wave leaves them stuttering
nonsense off their tongues,


Oh I don't doubt this for one second <grin>
the EVE is painted with perfection and
the twist of humor 'only left with three'
"Poor Young Men!" laughing, this poem
is a New Years Eve marvel, I can only
say you'll need to read it to get the full
effect but ... Never brought to mind
is an excellent poem~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A State by the dogman77004

clip~
The mind empty of all things


and then the thoughts come flooding in...
very good illustrated poem, where there
may not be a picture per say, the whole
literary Art is the creation. And nicely done!

thedogman77004 also has these poems post
today as well ...
To Live Again~
Waking Me Up~
I see God~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Lunacy by minsue
clip~
Is it madness that keeps me orbiting?


The gosling shines with this great
illustrated poem 'lunacy,' it captures
the cycle from gravity to 'tidal torment'
a superb piece of literary Art~
The Art work is marvelous, a perfect
combination of art and words!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Mr. Allen Ginsberg by foehn

clip~
I shook hands - oh god - with Allen Ginsberg in 1978 in Colorado.

inspirational~
foehns poetic abilities are obvious with this
great Poem, 'drum roll please'
'he had us pound feet on the floor, in a little church!'
you can feel the power of the poet in
this poem~ "Mr. Allen Ginsberg"~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Endless by Savannah Skye
clip~

The universe exploded in my belly
My mind became endless


this poem is a short blast into the cleverness
of this poet, an extraordinary witty poem
with 'abstract' lines that need re read for the
enjoyment and to grasp it's importance for
blending in with this short and intriguing poem
~~~~~Endless~~~~~~~
also ...
High Heel Dreams (long version)~
Sonnet 1: Ye Olde Gold Bar~
(these sound interesting)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

One way or another by KinkyByNatureRU
clip~

I shall seek and find you
I shall take you to bed and
have my way with you

'one way or another' ....
determination in poetic form, the
power of love or lust entangled in
Kinky's poem, 'one way or another'
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

sea of seductions by bluerains
clip~
but as the days glory
dims to crimson
a seasoned salt begins
drifting his attention homeward
where the beauty of his companion
awaits with the power that haunts
his nightly pleasures


very enchanting~
this is a paramount poem~
you can almost taste the salt air
with this read, very descriptive, interlaced
with poetic lines that stand alone~
~a seascape to remember~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I walk away by saldne

clip~

You picked me up
When I was down,
And said I deserved better,
But after five years
Of being together,
I now realize
We’re going nowhere


The charming wit of this poet explodes
in this poetic pearl, I can only imagine
the emotions and passion that flowed
to create this well thought about, 'giggle'
descision/poem!

also posted today by saldne ...
Another Colubine~
When I Am In Love~
Unforgiving Mistakes~
Say You'll Hold Tonight~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Passion's Dance by IcyLady

clip~

Slowly ascending to those rhythmic beats,
our intimate dance between the sheets.
Oh the pulsing ache of loves fires,
stokes the flame of burning desires.


this one clip alone doesn't show enough of
how this poem flows so well with rythym
and ryhme meanings and feelings.
This erotic poem is marvelous~
an enjoyable, tantalizing, erotic poem,
filled with PASSION in a wonderful
literary creation ~ 'Passion's Dance'
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Beach by sweetnpetite

I can only say that this 'little' poem says alot~
a poem that gives you the feeling
of being at the beach~ (~_*)

also by sweet~
Longing~
Ravishing~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
thats all folks!

have a poetic day!
 
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Well, I read, and voted, again today. And this is the best of the lot... and this was before I knew it had an E...

erogami

Way to go, Eve!
 
Sunday reviews...

Hi all...
Welll my mind is clear (if that ever can be said about the Du~) so I jumped on the poem pony and read away... here are my picks!

erogami Wicked Eve

Stunning! Bends the mind, body and soul. This is the best read yet for me here on Lit. The nuance of this write is blooming, spiritual and methodical. Renaissance whispers of a japanese tea cermony, erotic, intimate and asomatous.
Inspired now Eve..
thank you for the read..

I want to Seranade

I enjoyed the visuals here the simple "Want" speaking in terms to all... rain, bay,.. the art of two lovers... and child within turtle and puppy.. all levels of love and erotic entwinings..
ty
Du~

looks you don't see Erotic Tale

How many times do artists look at the tiny small essence of a shadow in order to write, paint, dance, sing or communicate a passionate longing? Here is an excellent metaphor on just that note... Obvious write about the reality of life.. I agree with Eve.. the later part of the poem is the strength..
thanx Art
Du~

another witty read with electric fun... from Art is...
damned if I do Erotic Tale

ashante porch wicked eve
left me...
HUNGRY lol.. this was like rolling a truffle over and over on my tongue, suckling the deep richness of the moment..damn girl this was good..
ty
Du~ damn girl.. you are on a roll... ! ;)

beyond the gray blue rain

whisper of haiku
a dreamy read with the womb of haiku transformations... most wonderful...
du~
Writers block Man Ray

Such wonderful wit that made me smile and giggle.. I have a big case of writers block right now.. hmmm need a wee bit of that cure you speak of... damn lol..
ty for the read
Du~

Thorns and roses Ninja Nookie

I enjoyed the beat of this poem.. and the contrast of beauty so smooth and soft, with a thorn that pricks bites pain and joy all wrapped up in an eclectic poem
nice read..
du~

Weeding / Wedding Sack

This was a fun read with a great mix of frustration and truimph.. a subtle gardening of handling lifes roots lol..
Love it
du~

Like this Mirror Poet

Wow.. this works well for me.. I loved the selection of mandarian orange.. I felt it squirting in my mouth, the spiced romance.. hmmm.. I saw hot bodies entwined with curry, thyme and sage aromas rushing through the air..
Sensual erotic and stimulating
great work
Du~
Mrs. Stauffer Noticed Annaswirls

Swirling is the word..
This is a swirling of emotions and life pictures Anna.. wow.. My mouth was full on this one! As I read it out loud my tongue experienced new positions and twisted with a lazy haze of passionate heat. Wow..
thank you
Du~

and finally...
Concrete seannelson

A thinkers poem, how many times do we really make the effort to do what this poem suggests.. what have we learned? Who from? why and how much time do we have left to change all of it?
hmmmm
Good work!
Du~

So there you go all.. so many poems on Sunday... lol.. looks like I am the only one who hasn't written anything lol.. (hangs head in shame, and wonders how she can get some of that writers block cure lol..:eek: )

So all happy reading and thank you to all who posted their work today.. so many and I can't comment on them all wish I could, those who I did not mention no slight intended just how it is .. time and life.. so write write write.. and comment on your fellow writers work!!! Remember the circle of life and writing.. what comes around goes around.. :D

blessings all
Du Lac~
 
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I would like to second this recomendation

mirror poet

Watch this poet, I know I will be. First poem posted on lit, obviously has experience elsewhere :)


go on you know you wanna click it ....:cool:
 
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Monday's reviews...

Awakening Thirsts
by RazzRajen

Swirling leaves in limpid pools of oiled patinas
Slivered morsels, kernels of
Almond coloured bits
The silent sounds of leather

Brilliant use of language. The images are sharp, clear, and piercing (no pun intended). :)

contemplating bowls
by Maria2394

they grew from wood which grew
from ash, and which love polished
and hope defined

The rhythm and depth of this is inspiring. I love the parallel and comparison of mother and bowl. Who am I kidding. I loved every word.

Renewal
by Tathagata

Summer arrives,
with impatient loins,slow
flowing sap
bloom burst nipples
and snow melt eyes

I want to live in your brain for a few days and float around in there. Maybe I'd get infected with some of the goo living there. :)
The progression of this piece, from the arrival of summer to the lingering scent of lavender, is smooth and enticing.

Only a Test?
by Maria2394

She does an amazing job of making the reader hear the unique sound of each well-chosen word. Each line rises up to meet the noises of the next in a structure that emphasizes each sound perfectly.

Sarah Harper
by BlackShanglan

Moving.

I keep coming back to this, and I continue to find myself without words. Please read.

~~~
Today was a lovely day for poetry :)
 
Tuesday the 1st of February's Reviews.

Well, to start things off on this winter morning (well, afternoon) we have 'Thoughts on a Winter's Morn' by Champagne1982. A little short, but far from simple, with a few turns, some excellent use of metaphor and some shining simile. A pleasure to read, this poem stands out as a triumph of substance over style.

‘Today, my world is gray.
Not that it matters.
Gray matter, I think
therefore I am….’

Next up is 'A Long, Empty Space' by Deepasleep.
Simple review: At first I laughed, then I emphasised and cried, then I remembered I was young and there was still hope for me… but all the way through I thought.

More Verbose review: Immediately disarming with its humour, this poem progresses from a comedic account of the knowledgeable naivety of adolescence to the realisation of ones aspirations and the responsibilities that go along with them. I felt a deep sympathy and empathy toward the sentiment delivered by (at least the first half of) this poem (heck, I even have a cousin who sells pharmaceuticals…) Intelligent, humorous, thoughtful and reminiscent, maintaining a familiar and almost lackadaisical manner throughout. Another thoroughly enjoyable read that’s getting book-marked as we speak….

‘I can’t sing, or play an instrument,
but I can whistle like a motherfucker.

I picked up all these skills,
like picking locks and fixing plumbing,
something like a jack of all trades,
I’d like to think,
but more like a jack of all asses.’

'Because I have the Power' by WickedEve both enticed and confused me at the first reading. After a few rereads, however, the clever use of two voices involved in the poem became apparent (that’s one in normal font and another in italic’s for any who fail to spot it….). To me it shows a hidden aspect of the dom/sub relation and with a lusty tone and a simple use of vocabulary, it’s a thoroughly erotic read, with the only complaint being the fact that it is quite short.

‘And dirt will be a pleasure,
because I make it so.’


Finally (for now at least) 'Missing You' by Petalsonfire deserves mention solely for the fact that it possesses the most ingenious use of the word sexcapades I have ever encountered. With a short, sharp rhythm and a heated tone this is just the thing to distract you before you feel the pull of that other thing you have to do.

‘Don’t start without me,
I’ll be back soon,
our sexcapades can then resume,
I miss you, when I’m far away,
but I feel your pull,
most, everyday!’


Ok... thats the first batch done... theres still the same amount to go through, so expect an update soon.
 
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