southern_gal
The zoo was fun.
- Joined
- Sep 20, 2012
- Posts
- 2,217
Do we want our partner to be jealous
Been away for a few days because finally my husband got home for a while. Now another question has reared it's ugly little head in my mind. Background - While he was home, we talked about so many things that in all of our married years have never been discussed. I showed him the Lit forums. (No I did not tell him my screen name) He read several threads all the way thru and decided that he liked the idea of me venturing onto Lit. I mean just in case I decided to actually start posting to the threads you understand. At any rate he is nothing short of thrilled at the new me. I am so much more willing to attempt some things that I never once imagined. Someone in an earlier thread compared my new experiences like being a kid in a candy store. It is like that exactly. Now the issue. We talked about the very real possibility of us inviting another person to our bed. He confided that he had always had a fantasy of watching me with another woman and even another man without him joining. Now I am somewhat conflicted. For some idiotic reason that I cannot explain, I am torn. Part of me likes the idea of him trusting me that much that he could actually be ok with me having sex with someone else even if he does not participate, and a teeny bit of me wants him to say no you don't, not without me. Why does a little part of me want to see him jealous? And another question that actually scares me. Even though I trust him completely, if he tells me that he has no problem with me having casual sex as long as I am not emotionally connected, does that mean that he feels like it is ok too? On the one hand I do realize that for most men an orgasm is simply that. Doesn't seem to matter if it is inside someone or in their own hand, it is just an orgasm and no really big deal. On the other hand, there is always the jealousy monster hiding in the background of my brain and the last thing I ever want to do is become possessive when in reality I am trying to be more open minded about things. I am so terribly sorry about the length but this is the first time I have stopped to really think about it.
Been away for a few days because finally my husband got home for a while. Now another question has reared it's ugly little head in my mind. Background - While he was home, we talked about so many things that in all of our married years have never been discussed. I showed him the Lit forums. (No I did not tell him my screen name) He read several threads all the way thru and decided that he liked the idea of me venturing onto Lit. I mean just in case I decided to actually start posting to the threads you understand. At any rate he is nothing short of thrilled at the new me. I am so much more willing to attempt some things that I never once imagined. Someone in an earlier thread compared my new experiences like being a kid in a candy store. It is like that exactly. Now the issue. We talked about the very real possibility of us inviting another person to our bed. He confided that he had always had a fantasy of watching me with another woman and even another man without him joining. Now I am somewhat conflicted. For some idiotic reason that I cannot explain, I am torn. Part of me likes the idea of him trusting me that much that he could actually be ok with me having sex with someone else even if he does not participate, and a teeny bit of me wants him to say no you don't, not without me. Why does a little part of me want to see him jealous? And another question that actually scares me. Even though I trust him completely, if he tells me that he has no problem with me having casual sex as long as I am not emotionally connected, does that mean that he feels like it is ok too? On the one hand I do realize that for most men an orgasm is simply that. Doesn't seem to matter if it is inside someone or in their own hand, it is just an orgasm and no really big deal. On the other hand, there is always the jealousy monster hiding in the background of my brain and the last thing I ever want to do is become possessive when in reality I am trying to be more open minded about things. I am so terribly sorry about the length but this is the first time I have stopped to really think about it.
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