Inequality Fetish

Hi, so I'm new to this board (been posting quite a bit on the Fetish board) but I wanted to reach out and float an idea your way. I figure since there's some Femdom lovers here this might be pertinent..

I'll start off by saying I am not really into the hardcore, pain and humiliation stuff that often gets stereotyped into Femdom, but both My bf and I are really into gentle Female superiority.

I just love the idea that men are second and Women are first, that We deserve special treatment because We are Women and that We should be worshipped and protected, while still maintaining Our independence and dignity.

There are varying aspects as to what turns Me on about this, but it can simple as scenes from an action movie where the hero kills a bunch of bad guys to save the Damsel or as sexy as an erotic video about men only receiving ruined orgasms while Girls can have as many as We want

I guess I'll start this thread out on that note and if anyone is interested in this stuff, now there's a thread to share!

_____

Consilience said:

You've basically just outlined the core aspect of 'femdom' ("Gentle female superiority"). Actually, probably most B/DS/M relationships in general.

From what you just said about hardcore pain and the apparent implication that you may be unaware that that isn't the only common aspect to it I'm guessing you're currently getting your information about the topic from dungeon porn? Whips & chains, latex bodysuits, claymore mines, anti-tank rifles, etc?
If you mean you're new-ish to DS then I'd love to inform you that that perspective really isn't realistic at all. Just like all porn really.

So ultimately; Asking "Is anybody interested in an unequal power dynamic" on a BDSM forum is a bit of a redundant question.
Being hurt is good and all but the power dynamic is the best part

Click to expand...

The unequal dynamic isn't universal. In my relationship we are both equals, and neither is superior. He's just in charge of what we do.

_____

Most BDSM relationships, even some of the more out there lifestyles, are balanced, the secret is the sub has all the real power, the Dom is trying to please, with his creativity. This is my just my takes, I work hard to please my Little so she will not get bored with me. I like being her Daddy, even when I am playing Video Games, I am thinking of ways to please her. New ways to let her reach her full potential, in anything she wants to do. One of the quirks of the DD/lg lifestyle, is while you can incorporate anything in the spectrum into it, in the Daddy wants his Little Girl to be her best.

My two cents
Ash

Consilience said:

That's what I meant, not 24/7 stuff if that's what it sounded like I was implying.

Click to expand...

Well, we aren't 24/7, but I think that's irrelevant. I've heard of others who are 24/7 who consider both partners equal, just one is in charge. It's just a different perspective. Neither is considered better or superior.

Consilience said:

That's what I meant, not 24/7 stuff if that's what it sounded like I was implying.

Click to expand...

I think I misread your post. My point is for us he is in charge during sex because it suits mine and his sexual needs. He hurts me, not to put me in my place, but because we both get off on it. He does things that might feel a little humiliating, not because I am lesser, but because we both find that exciting. He is very driven to give me pleasure too, because it suits both of us. I will do things for his pleasure when he tells me to because it is in my best interest for him to tell me what to do, and I like it when he feels good.

Do you see how all those acts could be described in a different way, with a female superiority perspective instead? The same acts, just a different mindset. D/s by its very nature doesn't have to be unequal. It can be, but it isn't for everyone.

Not everyone is coming to this with the same motivation or perspective. D/s is about authority exchange, and there are a wide variety of ways that can play out, with female superiority being one of them.

_____

Unequal power dynamic =/=unequal worth, so I don't find the question redundant at all.

I find the concept of one group being superior to another interesting in fiction, because of what it does to both those considered superior and those considered inferior.

In real life though if I have the upper hand, I want it to be because I'm me and not because I belong to some group or other.
In those cases where I see some hotness in having the upper hand, I prefer having it despite the odds.

Consilience said:

I think the *real* power is strongly dependent on who's involved but for such a case as yours, from my perspective, it's an equally symbiotic sharing of the power.
Ignoring the physical 'power' since that's generally quite one-sided in your favour, you make it out as though she's actually the one with you round her little finger since you're constantly striving to please and improve. But then again, being able to properly tempt and please you is probably her highest priority and if you were to just drop everything and walk off I doubt she'd apathetically "hmph" and stroll off in the other direction to find a new DD.
I'm not explaining this well but do you see how I'm trying to portray that it's pretty equally split?

Click to expand...

Okay, you are close, and more accurate as you think. It is a relationship needs all the same work as a Nilla, relationship. More so acctually, as BDSM screw up can lead to serious psych and Physical problems.

Sorry it took so long to respond my Little One was lurking and saw the post, and thought I should answer you, I had lost the thread.