different orgasm from sex vs. masturbation?

pisces_girl

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I don't know if I'm the only female who has experienced this: when you masturbate you achieve orgasm more quickly and in a specific way but during sex it's different. I know I can cum from sex but the orgasm is just completely different. Sometimes when I masturbate the orgasm is more intense and better. Whereas from sex it's more so the connection with my partner that I get satisfaction from. I guess what I want to know is how I can achieve the same intense type of orgasm not only from masturbating but also from sex.
 
I don't know if I'm the only female who has experienced this: when you masturbate you achieve orgasm more quickly and in a specific way but during sex it's different. I know I can cum from sex but the orgasm is just completely different. Sometimes when I masturbate the orgasm is more intense and better. Whereas from sex it's more so the connection with my partner that I get satisfaction from. I guess what I want to know is how I can achieve the same intense type of orgasm not only from masturbating but also from sex.

Wow. Please forgive me..I have been caught off guard. This seems like a Beck post, only with more words. Adjusting...


To answer your question, there has always been and will always be a difference between solo & having a partner. Even with a damn good partner.

When you are alone, you allow your mind to wander off to whatever makes the experience benefit your body. Maybe when you are with your partner, you try to focus on him/her and what they are doing at the time. It can distract you from what is going on in that pretty mind of yours.

Talk to him/her at a time when you are both relaxed and express what you are telling 'us'.. a group of somewhat strangers. You may be surprised at not only their response, but also what you reveal to yourself. Take a deep breath, be honest and relax!!!
 
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Wow. Please forgive me..I have been caught off guard. This seems like a Beck post, only with more words. Adjusting...

C'mon Cookie... you seem off your game.

The "more words" was a good first hint that this is not Mr. Bean's work. The thread subject is more complete (not just different in the subject line), the post is intelligible, and the thread doesn't appear to be a repeat or a similar thread to one started less than a week ago.

You might just have a wee case of the dog-shit shocks. After stepping in dog shit one too many times, you check your shoe for poop, even if only at a whiff of fart.
 
C'mon Cookie... you seem off your game.

The "more words" was a good first hint that this is not Mr. Bean's work. The thread subject is more complete (not just different in the subject line), the post is intelligible, and the thread doesn't appear to be a repeat or a similar thread to one started less than a week ago.

You might just have a wee case of the dog-shit shocks. After stepping in dog shit one too many times, you check your shoe for poop, even if only at a whiff of fart.

When you're right, you're right. :D
 
C'mon Cookie... you seem off your game.

The "more words" was a good first hint that this is not Mr. Bean's work. The thread subject is more complete (not just different in the subject line), the post is intelligible, and the thread doesn't appear to be a repeat or a similar thread to one started less than a week ago.

You might just have a wee case of the dog-shit shocks. After stepping in dog shit one too many times, you check your shoe for poop, even if only at a whiff of fart.

As a newbie to this forum, dare I ask what / who Mr. Bean is?
 
C'mon Cookie... you seem off your game.

The "more words" was a good first hint that this is not Mr. Bean's work. The thread subject is more complete (not just different in the subject line), the post is intelligible, and the thread doesn't appear to be a repeat or a similar thread to one started less than a week ago.

You might just have a wee case of the dog-shit shocks. After stepping in dog shit one too many times, you check your shoe for poop, even if only at a whiff of fart.

Well, I must confess that Beck did cross my mind when I read the OP's thread. I'm getting worried that Beck is taking over my mind. His threads remind me of a game of Jeopardy, Family Feud or Blockbusters:

Name something that goes like "arrggh" or What P is the name of a wild cat?
 
Same for men.

It's the same for men.

I prefer having an orgasm with someone else, at least 10 times more fufilling.

Even the worst lay I ever had was better than the best, most intense round of jerking off I ever did.
 
As a newbie to this forum, dare I ask what / who Mr. Bean is?

Welcome to the boards Justin,

Mr. Bean is my pet name for Beck31, the reason for which will become very evident once you read through any of his recent posts or threads.

He's harmless, a bit of an attention whore, and can be entertaining at times. But his post etiquette sucks farts, and has been the ruin of more than a few threads. He is prone to the occasional melt-down, doesn't recognize or use the good advice and recommendations offered him, and doesn't perceive sarcasm or hints, no matter how subtle or obvious.
Most of his posts / threads are about the same few subjects, just asked a different way. Did I mention he has a memory equivalent to the regular ridership of buses of the shorter variety?

Again, welcome aboard!
 
Getting back to the subject - and it's an interesting one, so sorry for the bump.

I've long been conscious of the fact that when I masturbate I usually have quite a different kind of orgasm from the kind I achieve during sex.

My orgasms are longer and more physically intense - the spasms of my climax feel more acute and sharper.

I suppose the reason is obvious. When I masturbate, it's just about me - I can really take my time, delay my climax, and just entirely focus on the sensations from my clitoris. When I come, all I need do is close my eyes, soar into the air, and just really enjoy my orgasm - every gorgeous jolt and nuance of it.

When I have sex, it's obviously not just about me! It's a mutual physical process. My sex orgasms are different in that they're often deeper, more bodily, and much more an emotional experience than just a physical one.
 
What more can I say? I totally agree with everything you've said . . .


Getting back to the subject - and it's an interesting one, so sorry for the bump.

I've long been conscious of the fact that when I masturbate I usually have quite a different kind of orgasm from the kind I achieve during sex.

My orgasms are longer and more physically intense - the spasms of my climax feel more acute and sharper.

I suppose the reason is obvious. When I masturbate, it's just about me - I can really take my time, delay my climax, and just entirely focus on the sensations from my clitoris. When I come, all I need do is close my eyes, soar into the air, and just really enjoy my orgasm - every gorgeous jolt and nuance of it.

When I have sex, it's obviously not just about me! It's a mutual physical process. My sex orgasms are different in that they're often deeper, more bodily, and much more an emotional experience than just a physical one.
 
Best

I have had some great climaxes all by myself and when I was younger and more innocent I would have said the best climaxes are from dry humping. Still, my absolute climaxes have been during sex and that includes for intensity.
 
with so much stimuli ...

JMHO from masturbation I can sometimes last longer.... unless it's on the phone, talking...sometimes less.

Having sex.... there's much more stimuli and it's "real" and you're also dealing w/ touch ! taste !
smell! when I cum it could be deeper .. possibly more cum ... last longer and possibily recover faster
going for another round
 
I generally agree with Cookie and Julie, and add the following.

Sex is only 20% physical, and the other 80% is mental. Only you know you best, and we often don't share our fantasies and desires, even with our partner, for fear of being judged and ostracized, or labelled as a freak. In this respect, I think that men and women are the same, except that men don't usually explore their emotional side of their sexuality.

In my own experience, the absolute BEST orgasm I've ever had was when I was in love, and just before orgasm, we both looked into each other's eyes and said, "I love you." It was mind blowing. We used all 100%, and then some.

So if you want better orgasms with your partner, you need to let them into your mind.
 
They are different because as others point out, when you do it with someone else there are emotions there, even with a fuck buddy, and also the physicality is different. In a sense, masturbation is fooling the nerve endings, simulating sex as it happens with another, and it also usually involves (least for me it does), fantasizing, going into a different place, to try and recreate what isn't there, the emotional and physical of doing it with someone else. It is interesting, i have heard people describe having had fuck buddy sex as almost being like masturbating using someone else, and I understand that, I have had that in my past, and it makes sense.

Sometimes you can have a more intense orgasm in masturbation, because you are creating your own world, and are doing things like delaying climax, backing off just before orgasm and then pushing forward, so it can be more intense in some ways then a regular orgasm....a lot of it depends on technique, too, a guy whose idea of sex is he sticks his dick into the woman's vagina, goes out it, cums and then pulls out, is going to be very different for both partners then if he takes his time, touches the women, changes motions, varies intensity, stops when he senses the woman is near orgasm, waits, goes on again, or who stimulates his wife's clit while fucking her, or who does other things.

For me it is two totally different things, having sex with someone you are into is worlds apart. Talking to my sweetie, it is very, very different when she masturbates, or if I do certain things to her outside penetrative sex, then if we do penetrative.....

The nice part? It is all good, and comparing is kind of useless, they are all different, and wonderful in their own way..still, I wouldn't want to lead a life where it was all masturbation,either, even if it is more intense physically (as some have said), because there also is the absolute thrill (to me) of watching a partner going to the moon and knowng they are getting that from being with me, that feeds it, too, that energy adds to the physical one.
 
If I were able to make a Top Ten Best Orgasms list, it would probably be a 50/50 split between solo and with a partner. If the list expanded to the Top 100, then I suspect that the solo ones would take a 65/35 lead.
 
---

the only way I know to accomplish what you're asking about is to say--,
practice, practice, practice.
 
I find all the technical sounding mumbo-jumbo funny. There are no rules stating a penis in a vagina will have X level of orgasm while outside the vagina the orgasm will hit a level of (X +/- Y) with Oral being = to (Y +/- G). I believe it is what it is for each of us. I've known females who can't have an inter vaginal organism (clit position being thecause). I've known females who strongly prefer dildoing before/after inervaginal sex with a penis. I have also known females who are FULLY satisfied with penial/vaginal sex . We are individuals and we everything and react to everything as individuals, IMO.
 
They are different because as others point out, when you do it with someone else there are emotions there, even with a fuck buddy, and also the physicality is different. In a sense, masturbation is fooling the nerve endings, simulating sex as it happens with another, and it also usually involves (least for me it does), fantasizing, going into a different place, to try and recreate what isn't there, the emotional and physical of doing it with someone else. It is interesting, i have heard people describe having had fuck buddy sex as almost being like masturbating using someone else, and I understand that, I have had that in my past, and it makes sense.

Sometimes you can have a more intense orgasm in masturbation, because you are creating your own world, and are doing things like delaying climax, backing off just before orgasm and then pushing forward, so it can be more intense in some ways then a regular orgasm....a lot of it depends on technique, too, a guy whose idea of sex is he sticks his dick into the woman's vagina, goes out it, cums and then pulls out, is going to be very different for both partners then if he takes his time, touches the women, changes motions, varies intensity, stops when he senses the woman is near orgasm, waits, goes on again, or who stimulates his wife's clit while fucking her, or who does other things.

For me it is two totally different things, having sex with someone you are into is worlds apart. Talking to my sweetie, it is very, very different when she masturbates, or if I do certain things to her outside penetrative sex, then if we do penetrative.....

The nice part? It is all good, and comparing is kind of useless, they are all different, and wonderful in their own way..still, I wouldn't want to lead a life where it was all masturbation,either, even if it is more intense physically (as some have said), because there also is the absolute thrill (to me) of watching a partner going to the moon and knowng they are getting that from being with me, that feeds it, too, that energy adds to the physical one.

I think njlauren hit the nail on the head :)
 
I'd go along with with the consensus here. Now I've been on HRT for a couple of years, orgasms have changed quite a bit ie they're more difficult to reach. I'd say though that ones from masturbation are more focussed. When I was with my partner they'd either be a damp firework or a total rail-crash - overwhelming, complete with tears, laughter, shaking... God, I miss that :(
 
.....a total rail-crash - overwhelming, complete with tears, laughter, shaking...

I agree with you, that's the way I orgasm is the full blown, "all out", overwhelming-ness...usually ends in me having an attack of the giggles. I think I've freaked out a few partners through the years with it, but meh, either they liked it or they didn't...

On the solo-orgasm note, I find it more difficult to make myself orgasm...don't know why, it's the way I'm "wired" I guess. Have tried it by myself or with someone watching (quite hot IMO!), but it takes a while...I think my head tries to tell my body it's biz'ness!
 
I agree with you, that's the way I orgasm is the full blown, "all out", overwhelming-ness...usually ends in me having an attack of the giggles. I think I've freaked out a few partners through the years with it, but meh, either they liked it or they didn't...

On the solo-orgasm note, I find it more difficult to make myself orgasm...don't know why, it's the way I'm "wired" I guess. Have tried it by myself or with someone watching (quite hot IMO!), but it takes a while...I think my head tries to tell my body it's biz'ness!
I'm so glad you posted that: it confirms my understanding of 'me' so despite still having a male body, my head is firing pink fireworks :)
 
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