J
JAMESBJOHNSON
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The whole condom thing is part of the liberal uplift dogma; no right thinking liberal does anything for the hell of it, whatever it is must conform to the dogma and canons.
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Sorry for reviving a thread that's a bit old. However, I was directed to this thread by someone linking to it in a more recent thread. Plus, unlike most of the threads in this forum I actually have an opinion on this topic.
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There seems to an attitude by some in this thread that writers of porn stories are morally obligated to include safe sex practices and messages in their stories "for the children". Or something like that. A pure load of a smelly brown substance that attracts flies.
Hey, Spacefender. No, we are just arguing here and in another threadpost that there is room for stories that include safe sex and that these can be a creative challenge, not at all that all stories ought to and must include safe sex.
I love lots of stories that don't have safe sex, although I write safe sex myself whenever I can.
There's certainly room for stories that feature safe sex. Nothing wrong with that. I don't mean you specifically but there were a few posts that at least implied that writing about safe sex in smut stories is the moral obligation for anyone writing porny stories on the internet.
What are your thoughts on writing safe sex?
I so much admired the way gay men's stories often make condoms a normal part of the erotic scenes. At first I thought since I write fantasy I couldn't do it but then I thought, "Really! what kind of writer are you? See it as a creative challenge." Some of my friends said they were surprised by the condoms popping up in my fantasy world (and one wanted me to use a special herb instead which he suggested could have other properties too - yes, he is of that generation) but nobody has complained in the feedback.
I partly decided to do this because of some research I've been doing on Sex and Relationships Education. I realised that although kids (in the UK anyway) are being taught how to put a condom on a banana, they aren't being taught to have the self-confidence to say: "No, I won't do it if it's not safe." I set up a blog which I have been developing where I'm reviewing erotica which is 'safe' as a portal for young people (well, people of any age really) who want to explore but might be nervous about just plunging into the wild and wonderful world of internet stuff on sex. Here I only review stories in which safe sex is practised, as I hope in this way to encourage people to feel condom usage is normal.
What do you think?
I'd like to write a blogpost about this on my other blog where I collect thoughts on writing erotica.
Feminist Erotica:
http://feministerotica.blogspot.co.uk/
Erotica Writers' Bloc:
http://feministeroticawriters.blogspot.co.uk/
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Naoko -
I suppose I'm part of the problem. I try to include condom usage in a sex scene but let's face it this is a site where people don't let the real world intrude in their fantasies LOL.
Seriously, I've actually had people call me out in the comments for making them use birth control. Seriously.
So it's kind of a mixed bag. I like to write a lot of oral sex in my stories, so as to not need to use birth control. But I agree that it does need to be featured more often and more clearly written into a sex scene.
Condoms in porn are more of the silliness that's infected writing. I think it was Samuel Goldwyn who said, "I buy stories, not messages; if you write messages take them to Western Union."
Condoms in porn are more of the silliness that's infected writing. I think it was Samuel Goldwyn who said, "I buy stories, not messages; if you write messages take them to Western Union."
Stories without condoms send a message, too. It's just a less responsible message.
Stories without condoms send a message, too. It's just a less responsible message.
Simply put, to me if a story is going to use condoms than they may as well use the words penis and vagina to make it even "sexier"
In fact, they could take it a step further and have the story end with "Sorry, but I really don't know you, lets wait until we've been dating awhile."
Then we get down to it, for foreplay the woman could douche beforehand because maybe she is just off her period and self conscious
This falls under the expression fucking up a wet dream.
My current story includes condoms. It made sense to me to include them given the context of the tale. I have a couple of twin brothers, one of whom picks up a girl at a nightclub and takes her back to his hotel room. The other brother is waiting, and they switch back and forth with the girl before she finally realizes she's been fucking two guys.
For this particular story, the use of condoms makes sense. It also negates an unnecessary plot element -- semen found in the poor young woman's body once it's found -- that I don't want to deal with.
In this case, the use of condoms is in itself a plot element, in that it prevents authorities from gaining evidence before I want them to.
Thank you. That is so well stated.I thought this thread was dead by now. But I do have one remark:
For a male audience, I can see the reasoning behind the no-condoms thing. It's just fantasy, after all, and in fantasy worlds, nobody gets diseases, and nobody gets pregnant unless they want to.
I suppose this holds true for some sorts of female audiences. Romance novels take place in a similar fantasy world. But when I started reading erotica, those fantasy worlds didn't work for me. So when I started writing erotica, I wrote what I wanted to read - -people being sexually active in a more realistic world -- in the hopes that there were more women (and maybe even men) out there like me who wanted to read that sort of thing.
And, as I've stated elsewhere, a great deal of my ability to enjoy a sexual encounter comes from the knowledge that I won't get pregnant or catch some sort of disease. I suspect that's true for most women. And if my writing is to be realistic, it must reflect that truth.
This isn't to say that everybody else has to write that way. Fantasy has its place. It's just not what I want to read, or to write.
Thank you. That is so well stated.
I so much admired the way gay men's stories often make condoms a normal part of the erotic scenes.
I'll be damned if I can figure out why my opinions have so much moral force for you, that you have to kick at my shins like a little kid being told to wash his hands.And the extrapolation from that is that there are others who want to read the fantasy sans condoms, so we'll just let them without telling them what they should read and write, right?
This I believe.I think chances are good that these were female authors writing gay stories and reacting from a female, not a gay male, perspective. I've never met a gay male who indicated that condoms would be part of a fantasy for him