Help me! (or at least give me your sympathy)

Okay, here’s the thing…

My symptoms of depression were irritability, sleeplessness, crying for no reason and at the drop of a hat, bizarre mood swings, feelings of guilt, low self-esteem (or self-loathing as a friend termed it) and feelings of isolation. After struggling with the intermittent symptoms for many years, I finally got up enough courage to go see my doctor about it a couple of weeks ago.

She started me on an anti-depressant and said we would wait a few weeks and see how I felt and then think about counseling if it were not simply a chemical imbalance causing my symptoms.

Being a nurse, I looked up the side effects of the medication she prescribed for me. I have always giggled when drug companies cover their asses by saying “may cause constipation or diarrhea, may cause lethargy or restlessness, may cause increased or decreased heart rate.” Make up thy mind!

I actually snickered when I got to the GU side effects of this med and it stated “anorgasmia.” That has certainly never been a problem for me. I have masturbated 3-4 times per week since discovering it when I was young and have never had a problem with getting off.

Well, after two weeks of taking this med, guess what side effect I have. That’s right, folks. And believe me I’ve tried. I’ve gone to sleep countless time with my hand between my legs, other times I just said “Fuck it” and have rolled over and gone to sleep anyway. Friends have sent me stories and videos. I’ve brought out all the toys. But no success.

Am I frustrated after two weeks with no orgasm? Hell, YES! Are my other symptoms better? Well, yes to some degree. I hesitate to ask for a change in medication since I’m seeing success. This is an embarrassing problem for me so I thought airing it publicly would make it easier to share when I’m face-to-face with my doctor next week.

So suggestions, sympathy, or snickers. Let me have it.

E., I've been on Effexor for a few years, Prozac before that. Yes, it effected me similarly but not constantly. In fact, I can't recall the last time I just couldn't arrive easily, manually. When I really needed the release a vibrator worked every time. Patience.

best to you, Perdita

It all depends on your priorities, hun. Depending on the depth of your depression, it can come down to survival vs orgasm. I'd give up the orgasm.

Hopefully, airing this here will help you speak of it more easily. I do hope you're able to work up the nerve to discuss it with your doc. There are lots of options out there.

ive heard that wellbutrin is one of the best re: sexual side effects.

Thanks guys! I'm trying to be patient. I know my emotional stability is more important than my sex life so I'm going to stick with the meds. Maybe I should just get better toys or better porn!

elizabethwest said:

<SNIP>
So suggestions, sympathy, or snickers. Let me have it.

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You have my deepest sympathies, as I have no pearls of wisdom to offer you at this moment in time. (I would never snicker at such a quality of life threatening problem... )

angelicminx said:

You have my deepest sympathies, as I have no pearls of wisdom to offer you at this moment in time. (I would never snicker at such a quality of life threatening problem... )

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Thanks, Minx. I appreciate the support.

*HUGS* to you, elizabeth.

Been there myself. Still working on it. I've had the problem you mention occasionally.

I'm not sure it's related to meds as it never lasted long.

Be patient.

On the other hand, if it persists and it really bothers you, don't be afraid to ask your doctor to change the meds.

rgraham666 said:

*HUGS* to you, elizabeth.

Been there myself. Still working on it. I've had the problem you mention occasionally.

I'm not sure it's related to meds as it never lasted long.

Be patient.

On the other hand, if it persists and it really bothers you, don't be afraid to ask your doctor to change the meds.

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Thanks, Rg. It's good to know I'm not the only one out here who has gone through something like this.

elizabethwest said:

... or better porn!

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I'm working on it....

carsonshepherd said:

I'm working on it....

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Thanks, baby. I'm trying to be patient...

Hey if you need better porn, try my latest. It's in my sig.

I write pretty good smut if I say so myself.

rgraham666 said:

Hey if you need better porn, try my latest. It's in my sig.

I write pretty good smut if I say so myself.

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Thanks, doc, I'll give it a read.

So sorry to hear about this unfortunate side effect, darlin'. By all means ask your doctor right away if she can perscribe something else for you. There are a variety of anti-depressants on the market these days and I'm sure you can find one to suit your needs. It takes awhile sometimes to see any results as far as your depression goes with these drugs, but side effects seem to show up right off the bat. Orgasm seems like a small sacrifice to make for overall mental well-being, but if that's one of the few simple pleasures that makes life worth living then you cannot go without. Tell your doctor and if she won't change it, find someone who will. Love, S.

OhMissScarlett said:

So sorry to hear about this unfortunate side effect, darlin'. By all means ask your doctor right away if she can perscribe something else for you. There are a variety of anti-depressants on the market these days and I'm sure you can find one to suit your needs. It takes awhile sometimes to see any results as far as your depression goes with these drugs, but side effects seem to show up right off the bat. Orgasm seems like a small sacrifice to make for overall mental well-being, but if that's one of the few simple pleasures that makes life worth living then you cannot go without. Tell your doctor and if she won't change it, find someone who will. Love, S.

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Thanks for the support, Scarlett. I'm going to talk to her about it but my appointment isn't until Friday. I can hang on that long. I hope.

Hi Elizabeth.

If I can introduce an orgasm numbing topic for me, my mother went on anti-depressants last year and the "typical" side effects (though we didn't talk about the sexual ones) like fatigue were transient for her. The longer she was on the drug, the more she "leveled" out. Perhaps, the correction of the chemical imbalance will work the same for you as your body acclimates itself to the changes.

I wish you spectacular orgasms and a peaceful heart; and if it helps, I fall asleep with my hand in my panties sometimes, too.

Luck,

Yui

yui said:

I wish you spectacular orgasms and a peaceful heart; and if it helps, I fall asleep with my hand in my panties sometimes, too.

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LMAO!! Thanks, Yui for the laugh. At least I'm not the only one!

*hugs*

Hopefully everything will work out well. I'll keep my fingers crossed for you .

Shadowskill Knight said:

*hugs*

Hopefully everything will work out well. I'll keep my fingers crossed for you .

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Thanks. I appreciate that.

How does a little unabashed stroke grab you?

carsonshepherd said:

How does a little unabashed stroke grab you?

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Bring it on baby and I'll give it a test drive. Do I need to break out some fresh batteries?

Elizabeth,
do you need a hand?

DrF
Edited: Just wanted to say that the thought of Yui and you falling asleep with your hands in your panties is giving me no sleep.

DrFreud said:

Elizabeth,
do you need a hand?

DrF

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Well, my own doesn't seem to be working all that effectively...

DrFreud said:

Elizabeth,
do you need a hand?

DrF
Edited: Just wanted to say that the thought of Yui and you falling asleep with your hands in your panties is giving me no sleep.

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Would it help if they just took those pesky panties off?