Why don't you post?

I was looking through the active users section and noticed that there are a large number of folks that have been members for quite a while but have never posted. It makes me wonder why not. I feel that with all those that don't post, there must be some that would have interesting things to share.

I'll throw out some questions for non posters, although anyone is welcomed to respond.

1. Have you come to chat only, and found someone?

2. Are you afraid of being found on a sex site?

3. Are you worried about reactions to your posts?

The more people post, the more interesting and varied this site will be.

I post from time to time, more often I lurk and read. In response:

1. No.
2. No.
3. Yes. People here are mean sometimes. I’m delicate.

Some people might just log on to read too to get ideas. I've heard a lot of that when I PM with people

Or they need the login to make comments on stories where the author does not accept anonymous comments.

AlotLikePsyche said:

I post from time to time, more often I lurk and read. In response:

1. No.
2. No.
3. Yes. People here are mean sometimes. I’m delicate.

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I agree and especially when english is not your first language while you re trying to get in.

I guess there is also the fact that you re affraid of not being on the same wave

Hipshot1554 said:

I was looking through the active users section and noticed that there are a large number of folks that have been members for quite a while but have never posted. It makes me wonder why not. I feel that with all those that don't post, there must be some that would have interesting things to share.

I'll throw out some questions for non posters, although anyone is welcomed to respond.

1. Have you come to chat only, and found someone?

2. Are you afraid of being found on a sex site?

3. Are you worried about reactions to your posts?

The more people post, the more interesting and varied this site will be.

Click to expand...

FWIW:

The authors index and forum share a data file. If a person is an only an author they will show up as a forum member with no posts. I believe my author's identity is one of those, although I may have posted once or twice under that name.

FWIW2:

There are a lot of people who create a username and then decide the forum isn't what they are interested in and never log in again.

My desire to post, even my desire to enter these forums, is steadily declining. They've just become disgusting. Even some of the thread titles alone say things that I wish I had never seen. I thought I could learn to look past it, or maybe become somewhat immune to it, but I can't.

There used to be other women in these forums who I admired and with whom I could relate, but it appears they have all left.

I may continue to post stories, but I am finding it more and more difficult just to enter these forums.

littlecordelera said:

My desire to post, even my desire to enter these forums, is steadily declining. They've just become disgusting. Even some of the thread titles alone say things that I wish I had never seen. I thought I could learn to look past it, or maybe become somewhat immune to it, but I can't.

There used to be other women in these forums who I admired and with whom I could relate, but it appears they have all left.

I may continue to post stories, but I am finding it more and more difficult just to enter these forums.

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Things have changed since I first joined. It was under a different username, and many years ago.

littlecordelera said:

My desire to post, even my desire to enter these forums, is steadily declining. They've just become disgusting. Even some of the thread titles alone say things that I wish I had never seen. I thought I could learn to look past it, or maybe become somewhat immune to it, but I can't.

There used to be other women in these forums who I admired and with whom I could relate, but it appears they have all left.

I may continue to post stories, but I am finding it more and more difficult just to enter these forums.

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Really sad, but true. I tend to only be able to find a select few of the Forums/Threads of much interest. So many consist of mere grunts of two or three words...and then there's the really angry and aggressive ones, and all the bickering between what they call Alt's ???

But, there are also some really interesting Threads, and really intelligent and kind folks too. It seems the more interesting Threads are tucked away in the sub-Forums. So I stay for that and try to add my small contributions as I can.

I'm pretty much limited to Author's Hangout, BDSM/BDSM Cafe, Story Ideas, LBGT on occasion, and How To

As Weird_Harold pointed out, for a long time I really didn't even realize the forums existed.

Even once I did, speaking as another "delicate flower" I agree that it took awhile for me to come out of my shell. (The line to cram me back in starts to the left.)

And, well... to be honest, it's not all that often I find a thread I feel a burning need to hang my ass out to be paddled in.

Generally, I'll only pop up in the HT forums if a question is asked I actually have enough knowledge about to be dangerous, and then only if no one else seems to be around and interested in answering. (Or when I start my own thread.)

I'm a little more open in the AH (where I fully expect not to be taken seriously except by neophytes who don't know any better), but typically only to spark conversation by older and more knowledgeable hands. Even if it's only to correct what I screw up.

The Story Ideas forum and Looking For a Story sub-forum are typically the only other two I'll make an appearance in fairly often, although I will stick my nose in virtually anything from time to time when I'm bored. But, just to lurk in the latter cases unless something really strikes my humor.

Except of course the GB. Made that mistake just once many blue moons ago and promptly started a virus scan and went to take four back to back showers.

But, yeah. I've often felt that it's a mistake to criticize a society (for example these very forums) if you aren't prepared to attempt to exert a positive influence on that same society to the best of your abilities. (Dubious abilities in my case, but there it is.)

And, I'm probably not contributing anything worthwhile. Not to mention I think I may have strained something being that serious for so many consecutive words, so I'm gonna go see if I can stir up something by injecting what passes for a sense of humor elsewhere and try to work out the cramp in my psyche. Maybe in my Spreading the VD (for Valentine's Day) Cheer thread where I'm attempting to imitate the Fuck Up Fairy filling in for Cupid.

PuckIt said:

As Weird_Harold pointed out, for a long time I really didn't even realize the forums existed.

Even once I did, speaking as another "delicate flower" I agree that it took awhile for me to come out of my shell. (The line to cram me back in starts to the left.)

And, well... to be honest, it's not all that often I find a thread I feel a burning need to hang my ass out to be paddled in.

Generally, I'll only pop up in the HT forums if a question is asked I actually have enough knowledge about to be dangerous, and then only if no one else seems to be around and interested in answering. (Or when I start my own thread.)

I'm a little more open in the AH (where I fully expect not to be taken seriously except by neophytes who don't know any better), but typically only to spark conversation by older and more knowledgeable hands. Even if it's only to correct what I screw up.

The Story Ideas forum and Looking For a Story sub-forum are typically the only other two I'll make an appearance in fairly often, although I will stick my nose in virtually anything from time to time when I'm bored. But, just to lurk in the latter cases unless something really strikes my humor.

Except of course the GB. Made that mistake just once many blue moons ago and promptly started a virus scan and went to take four back to back showers.

But, yeah. I've often felt that it's a mistake to criticize a society (for example these very forums) if you aren't prepared to attempt to exert a positive influence on that same society to the best of your abilities. (Dubious abilities in my case, but there it is.)

And, I'm probably not contributing anything worthwhile. Not to mention I think I may have strained something being that serious for so many consecutive words, so I'm gonna go see if I can stir up something by injecting what passes for a sense of humor elsewhere and try to work out the cramp in my psyche. Maybe in my Spreading the VD (for Valentine's Day) Cheer thread where I'm attempting to imitate the Fuck Up Fairy filling in for Cupid.

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Puck, you are a ray of sunshine in a sometimes cloudy day. You're good cheer doesn't go unnoticed, and in my (sometimes humble) opinion... good cheer and "delicate" words are often more important than we realize. So sorry you "strained something" being forced into serious mode...

I know enough about writing to know I'm not a writer, a barely literate hack among pros. Better to be thought a fool than to confirm it.

Hipshot1554 said:

I was looking through the active users section and noticed that there are a large number of folks that have been members for quite a while but have never posted. It makes me wonder why not. I feel that with all those that don't post, there must be some that would have interesting things to share.

I'll throw out some questions for non posters, although anyone is welcomed to respond.

Click to expand...

1. Have you come to chat only, and found someone?
I chat in PM's, play in playground, post pics in AM Pics, read (but rarely post) in writer forums, sometimes poke bears in GB. For a while there I was into posting polls.

2. Are you afraid of being found on a sex site?
Yes. Would ruin my career- I'm a manager at a very conservative company. Which is one reason I like it here- I can let my hair down, so to speak.

3. Are you worried about reactions to your posts?
No, because I keep it light and avoid drama.

The more people post, the more interesting and varied this site will be.
It is what it is. I grow tired of it and disappear until I want to try again. I've been gone up to a year at a time.

Why I didn't post

First to answer Hotshot1554's questiona,
1. No, I didn't join Lit to chat only or meet someone. More of an erotic outlet actually.
2. Most definetely.
3. Not really.
As you can tell, I spent a great of time on lit just lurking. I didn't post until I ran across a thread that totally intrigued me. It so mirrored my own situation that I felt compelled to post. The anonymity had been a key factor in that first post. I haven't as yet encountered any negatively, Although being somewhat naive I may have missed it. After my first post, I was encouraged by a wonderful member to write about my feelings in order to be more comfortable with them. I am starting to do so and am feeling comfortable here on Lit and right now having some fun. I haven't yet ventured onto the politics forum, in which I have a keen interest, for fear of running into that negativity and anger.

As one forever posting [!!] I've read the thread and would like to say:

I'm really sorry that there are Litsters who feel the whole forum is moving in the direction of "disgusting", with lovely genuine people leaving. OK people come and go. OK there are regular posters who just seem not real. But I have very real friendships here, women and men, beautiful people who I would so like to meet in rl as I admire and value them.

The General Board, OK, has its proportion of regular posters who rubbish the cautious and vulnerable. But I don't see that happening on the other Boards and sub-forums! I find most of Literotica to be significantly kinder than several other public social media forums. Frankly, I'm more likely to be snapped at and put down on my Beekeepers' Forum than I am on here!

When I see the huge difference between the number of hits and the number of posts on the threads I host - the 'sharing good experience' ones - great orgasms, cockrings, herbal enhancers - it makes me feel good that, alongside the thread's visible community there is this much larger invisible number of people who are, I hope, gaining some knowledge or perception or expertise which will enrich their sexual experience. That's good even if they choose to say nothing here!

Hipshot1554 said:

I was looking through the active users section and noticed that there are a large number of folks that have been members for quite a while but have never posted. It makes me wonder why not. I feel that with all those that don't post, there must be some that would have interesting things to share.

I'll throw out some questions for non posters, although anyone is welcomed to respond.

1. Have you come to chat only, and found someone?

2. Are you afraid of being found on a sex site?

3. Are you worried about reactions to your posts?

The more people post, the more interesting and varied this site will be.

Click to expand...

1. No and no.
2. Eh. I haven't given it much thought. Apparently not though since I show my face.
3. Not really no. I try to be fun. It doesn't always work, but I can usually ignore those who don't want me around.

Like Suckonsimon, I find it sad so many people are leaving from here or have had such continually bad experiences. Help me Rhonda and Rainshine are lovely ladies and I hate that you all feel bad here.

My take on this?

At one time I came to Literotica only to read stories and to post a few of my own. It was sometime before I even discovered the forums.

Back then the forums were largely a safe and inviting place where people could post about sex and sexuality, their experiences, kinks and fetishes, and their questions and concerns without judgment or snide one line comments. At that time, discussions consisted of well thought out and cerebral thoughts and comments from people who took the time to actually string words together in coherent thought.

Those days are gone and, with the exception of the occasional thread which entails more deep thought, most of the threads have denigrated into nothing but picture posting threads with little more than a few visceral grunts or profanity and slang laced one liners as "discussion". Oh, and let's not forget the inevitable animated GIF's.

For a site that is centered around literature, and the use of cogent thought to express action, scenes and feelings as represented by WORDS, it's discouraging to see that the forum sections have largely become a place were words, strung together in rational thought, are so rarely used any more.

With the picture posts, the forum sections have become so that they are more akin to TGP (thumbnail gallery post) sites than discussion boards. Safe, non-judgmental discussion of sex and sexuality, especially alternative "non-vanilla" sex and sexuality, is a rarity. This forum used to do a good job of filling that niche but it doesn't any longer. I can find explicit images, GIFs and little bytes of video anywhere, honest discussion is a lot harder to find.

I still occasionally wade in and try to have thoughtful and thought provoking discussions on some threads, or even relate a bit of a literary description of my thoughts and experiences, but it is largely answered with cricket chirps on the other end.

Perhaps some of that is why there are so many Literotica members who never, or rarely, post on the forum.

Subscribed Threads

I do post quite often, and scan selected threads as well. I have learned to limit my reading and posts to only certain threads to which I have subscribed. So, when I log in, I just look through my 'Subscribed Threads' list under the 'Quick Links' heading. This keeps me sane while satisfying my 'Lit itch'.

I have to agree with a lot of what's been said here. Early on I read and posted some stories using an alt, but the boards were interesting too. My post count isn't very high given the amount of time that has passed and a fair amount has been recent. I've always been somewhat sporadic, and many times by the time I discover a thread other people have already covered the things that I might have contributed. If I feel like I have something new to add, I'll chime in.

Being an off-and-on reader can make it challenging to weed through recent posts to find interesting threads. There are good people posting interesting and thoughtful threads, but the signal to noise ratio seems to have gotten much worse over time. I'm not interested in the personals or much in the way of what the playground, roleplay, or picture boards have to offer so that limits ways in which I can contribute here. I made a very good friend on lit, and had a lot of great conversations offline. We met critiquing porn clips, so the video link threads aren't completely worthless . More recently I've made a good friend after a discussion about religion evolved from a playground thread. It's hard to say what will come of even mundane posts.

The signal to noise ratio seems to have gotten much worse over time. To each his or her own. People will talk about what they want to talk about, but it's often not what I'm interested in reading or talking about. I avoid threads that involve incest, threads that devalue people and personal relationships, attention seeking, meaningless sex, and sexual thrill seeking. There are other web sites with discussions that are more focused on the things that I am interested in, so I will often check there first if I have spare time.

The GB has always had a lot of potential in terms of topics, but has always seemed to be very unfriendly and intolerant of discussing differing opinions. I read a lot of discussions off Lit, including reader feedback on news stories. It seems to me that in general people have become much less tolerant of other people's ideas and opinions, and discussion has been replaced with polarizing bullying and name calling. It's not unique to lit.

1. Have you come to chat only, and found someone?
I've never used Lit chat but have found people to talk to either through PMs or other ways. I like making friends.

2. Are you afraid of being found on a sex site?
I've sent my wife links to Lit threads. I don't do or say things here that I wouldn't want her to read or know about. Our marriage and relationship, including sex is private in real life but I often will write about our experiences here. Being "found out" might make our private lives public, but in general I don't think anyone cares.

3. Are you worried about reactions to your posts?
I often post to threads where the topic author is struggling with a problem or looking for advice. I hope my replies are positive and helpful, and don't sound judgemental. Posting about problems or sensitive things makes us feel vulnerable, so I am cautious. Even if what I have to say misses the mark or isn't helpful, I would hate to have anyone feel hurt or regret posting because of something that I wrote.

And then there is the fear of becoming "the thread killer," the last person to post and then no one else ever responds and you are left wondering if it really had reached the end of it's viable lifespan before you found it or if it was something you said that made everyone walk away as if you'd ripped a pickled eggs and whiskey fart, leaving you standing there looking and feeling awkward as hell.

And you watch for days and weeks and even months as that particular thread remains white when you check your subscriptions indicating no one else has posted. Until suddenly necro-man comes along to save the day and you heave a sigh of relief. And remove it from the list you are following so you won't be tempted to say something else and turn out to be "that guy" again.

The conflict is real people!

pplwatching said:

The GB has always had a lot of potential in terms of topics, but has always seemed to be very unfriendly and intolerant of discussing differing opinions. I read a lot of discussions off Lit, including reader feedback on news stories. It seems to me that in general people have become much less tolerant of other people's ideas and opinions, and discussion has been replaced with polarizing bullying and name calling. It's not unique to lit.

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While that may be true now, I don't necessarily agree with this assessment of the General Board of old. At one time, I found that it was a safe place to post questions and start discussions of issues that didn't seem to fit anywhere else. "Back in the day" (even predating my current username), I had some great, non-judgmental, discussions of the old "nature vs nurture" question on the General Board. Laurel herself frequently waded into the discussions back then. Heaven forbid that you could do that on there now.

Back then, as the names and descriptions of the sections implied, Politics, and the incivility that often goes with it, stayed on the Politics Board and the General Board, as the description provides was the place for " talk about something not covered anywhere else."

Also, back then, these threads with thousands of posts consisting of nothing but images or links to images and videos simply did not exist. I guess the admins don't care to moderate that kind of traffic anymore because it brings lots of "hits" to the threads, and hits/traffic means money.

PuckIt said:

And then there is the fear of becoming "the thread killer," the last person to post and then no one else ever responds and you are left wondering if it really had reached the end of it's viable lifespan before you found it or if it was something you said that made everyone walk away as if you'd ripped a pickled eggs and whiskey fart, leaving you standing there looking and feeling awkward as hell.

And you watch for days and weeks and even months as that particular thread remains white when you check your subscriptions indicating no one else has posted. Until suddenly necro-man comes along to save the day and you heave a sigh of relief. And remove it from the list you are following so you won't be tempted to say something else and turn out to be "that guy" again.

The conflict is real people!

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The conflict isn't real for me. I say what I have to say in an honest, thoughtful and thorough manner. I tend to be very thorough and detailed in my posts which I guess, might have inadvertently killed dozens of threads. I really don't give a rat's ass since I say what I think needs to be said. Life's too short to worry about what people, who are largely anonymous to each other, think about my basically anonymous post. It's not as if we're going to see each other and get into an argument about it at the grocery store.

I used to post a lot but it seems these days I can't think of anything interesting and relevant to say, or I have lost the eloquence to say it well.

I went through a period of 'well just throw in a stupid joke' but it never went well.

I think some people here live to troll others. They can be very rude, and there are many phony accounts.

I was thinking of posting about how a recent online writing partner from here seems to have ghosted in past months. I respected her privacy and didn't ask for an email, but I look back on so many happy message and posts I have to wonder what happen to my roleplay writing soulmate. I'm not sure where to post it, but I don't need to read insults from people who seem to live to be jerks protected by the Internet.

This should be about erotica and literture, but lately it seems like only the based emotions. Creativity and civility are lacking.

JawnKarTurr said:

I think some people here live to troll others. They can be very rude, and there are many phony accounts. .

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Some years back, when newsgroups were the main way of 'blogging' online, I found this advice which I think can still be true in Lit threads:

"The only way to deal with pests, trolls, flamers, and other trouble makers in news groups is to ignore them.
Do not reply to them.
Do not respond to them.
Do not try to refute them.
Do not try to convert them.
Do not try to answer them.
Do not try to reason with them.
In other words, ignore them completely. They will eventually tire of the game and go away. Do a ‘Block Sender’ or kill-file if you want, but shunning is the best remedy."