Not Interested In Oral Sex
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toshiskitten
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Some may find it odd but if it doesn't excite you then what can you do?
pairodoxxx
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Do you do anything with your mouth? Kissing? Sucking her nipples? Licking and kissing the nape of her neck? Maybe a little gentle biting? You be somewhat oral, and not touch each other's genitals. Although, not being able to go down on my wife would be incomprehensible to me. And her oral talents are off the charts pleasurable.
Maybe you haven't had a great experience receiving, or the woman wasn't clean down below?
Maybe you haven't had a great experience receiving, or the woman wasn't clean down below?
pairodoxxx
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It took the right woman for me to really enjoy receiving. Maybe that is why she is my wife? The thing I have learned, is that everyone is turned on by different things. There are people that love feet, I am not one of those. Do you have a partner that shares in your lack of interest in this aspect of sex?
Somehowyou
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Y-e-s
ace_high
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I'm not seeing anyone at this time.
ace_high
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I've never done either, as I said, I'm just not interested in the idea.
pairodoxxx
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Could be why?
Sometimes going out of your comfort zone, and doing something special for your partner can be invigorating for a relationship.
Reba67
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There are definitely some things that a few years ago or even a few months ago I would have told you were not turn ons at ALL. But now they are. In terms of oral, my boyfriend and I moved fairly slow in terms of what we would do to each other.
SweetErika
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Have you ever been intimate with anyone? If so, how did they feel about it?
I think it's somewhat unusual, yes, but there are also plenty of other people who don't like giving and/or receiving oral. Hopefully you're clear about your disinterest at the start of any sexual relationship and can find someone who's compatible with you in this area so no one feels like they're being pressured or missing out on anything.
BertrandRussell
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This strikes me as a bullshit question. Of course it is odd. And unless you have spent the last 20 of your 27 years in a cave or in a monestery under a vow of silence, you know that it is odd. Every guy on the planet except you and a few monks wants his dick sucked. And I'm not so sure about the monks.
Ask the real question that you want to ask. It is probably "Is there something wrong with me?", or maybe "How do I learn to enjoy it?" , or perhaps "How do I cope with my fucked-up childhood?"
There are some good and wise people here on this forum - and even a few who are both. They will give you useful answers.
ace_high
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First:
I should be clear about this: I have never been physically intimate with someone. I made a promise to myself and my future wife a long time ago that I would wait until I was married before having sex. That's just the choice that I made. I realize other people have made different choices and I respect that. I don't judge and I don't push my beliefs on others. (Although, ironically I have had those who have made different choices than I have judge and try to force their beliefs on me). Again, it was simply a choice that I made.
Second:
I didn't ask if there was anything 'wrong' with me as I don't think there is, at least not in this respect. The motive behind my question was to see if there were any other men or women who felt the same way.
Third:
Believe me, I am constantly dealing with my 'fucked up childhood.' (Let's just say my father's idea of 'tough love' was throwing you up against a wall.)
I should be clear about this: I have never been physically intimate with someone. I made a promise to myself and my future wife a long time ago that I would wait until I was married before having sex. That's just the choice that I made. I realize other people have made different choices and I respect that. I don't judge and I don't push my beliefs on others. (Although, ironically I have had those who have made different choices than I have judge and try to force their beliefs on me). Again, it was simply a choice that I made.
Second:
I didn't ask if there was anything 'wrong' with me as I don't think there is, at least not in this respect. The motive behind my question was to see if there were any other men or women who felt the same way.
Third:
Believe me, I am constantly dealing with my 'fucked up childhood.' (Let's just say my father's idea of 'tough love' was throwing you up against a wall.)
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fuckmeat
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It's probably just something you don't fantasise about because of your lack of experience. Most people have no clue what they're into until they start having sex and even then, they can discover new fantasies and urges at any time in their life. There are loads of people who are on Lit because they've developed a taste for something different as they've got older.
You don't know who you are as a sexual being yet. You really shouldn't worry about things like that until you've got married and found out.
There's always a risk that you'll meet someone who has different sexual tastes than you but you compromise and work it out. You shouldn't start imagining that not being turned on by the idea of a blowjob is some mental roadblock between you and Mrs Right. (just make sure her 1st name isn't 'Always')
You don't know who you are as a sexual being yet. You really shouldn't worry about things like that until you've got married and found out.
There's always a risk that you'll meet someone who has different sexual tastes than you but you compromise and work it out. You shouldn't start imagining that not being turned on by the idea of a blowjob is some mental roadblock between you and Mrs Right. (just make sure her 1st name isn't 'Always')
ace_high
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I very much appreciate your kind and reassuring words. Thank you. It really does mean a lot.
SweetErika
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I disagree.
Even if the OP insists on waiting to be sexual with another person until marriage, he should certainly find out who he is as a sexual being well before as much as possible via masturbation and research. Most people are sexual creatures whether they're with a partner or not.
Sexual compatibility is extremely important, and people need to find out about that prior to marriage because compromise often just doesn't happen. IOW, the OP shouldn't leave compatibility with his future wife to chance - they should discuss everything under the sun and experiment as much as possible to find out if they have enough in common to be sexually satisfied long-term. The oral sex thing is just one area that could present problems.
sunandshadow
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The first guy I dated did not like oral, either giving or receiving, because he thought it was gross. I think in the past few decades there have been more and more people who have a phobia of 'perceived to be dirty' things like bodily fluids, body hair, bugs, and regular old dirt outdoors. I think this is an unfortunate but natural side effect of increased education about how to prevent contagious diseases, food poisoning, and parasites, and particularly the way health/sex ed classes present children with both cartoon evil germs and photos of the horrible consequences of incurable stds.
YANKEE DAN
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Two girls I have dated were both surprised when I went down on them the first time. They told me that of their past lover most refused to do that. So TC is not alone. Also I have heard a few women say they though oral was gross so he could find a compatible lady.
Quite likely though your gonna encounter women who get pissed that you won't eat them.
Quite likely though your gonna encounter women who get pissed that you won't eat them.
YANKEE DAN
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In that case your fucking set LOL. Cause most girls are more willing to get then give.
fuckmeat
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Masturbation and research is simply not going to prepare this guy for being sexually active with a woman in the future. If he marries a woman who is also virgin, what are they going to discuss? Lots of people who vow chastity include everything except kissing in that vow. It seems stupid to me to pledge not to put cock in pussy and then proceed to do absolutely everything but. What is the point or value of such a pledge?
IMO masturbation and research is just going to isolate the man and make him view marital relations as checklists. It's easy for you to insist that knowledge and experimentation is power but lots of couples like to keep a little mystique until their honeymoon.
StevenWill
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It is..
difficult to know whether you might enjoy something you have never tried. Goes for broccoli, oysters and oral sex. In a safe and nurturing environment you can try it without pressure. Some of us have backgrounds that put oral pleasure into the front of our minds from early on. Others not so much. Depends on your family, peers, religion, etc. Keep an open mind and willing to experiment when the situation presents itself.
s
difficult to know whether you might enjoy something you have never tried. Goes for broccoli, oysters and oral sex. In a safe and nurturing environment you can try it without pressure. Some of us have backgrounds that put oral pleasure into the front of our minds from early on. Others not so much. Depends on your family, peers, religion, etc. Keep an open mind and willing to experiment when the situation presents itself.
s
SweetErika
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I'd start with discussing sexual attitudes, fantasies, any fetishes, expectations, limits, etc.
I never said they should do everything but PiV sex - just that they should explore as much as they're comfortable with. And, hey, if that's everything up to PiV intercourse, who are we to judge?
So what's your suggestion for increasing the odds of sexual compatibility if finding someone who's compatible in other ways and hoping for the best/compromise doesn't count (because that so rarely works out)?
