BDSM addiction?

Is BDSM an addiction?
If it is, what do you think about it?
If it's not, what is the psychological "need" for it?

This isn't meant to promote one way of thinking, even though it kind of sounds like that by my last question. Unfortunately, that was the only way I could think of to phrase that.

I'm curious to hear what everyone has to say on this.

~Red.

It is an interesting topic from many angles. I did this one long ago, though from memory it was more from a masochist standpoint than straight out submission. Will be interesting to see what people think about it.

Catalina

just as it is true about everything else in this world
yes people can get addicted to BDSM
at least that is what i think

i also think there is a difference between addiction and obssession
and that these characteristics are not what BDSM ers are made of
nor do i believe this to be an affliction (bad sp - i know) overly common in BDSMers
but that is just in my personal experience with the ppl i know

does it happen/can it happen?
i say yes

addiction as in i would seek it out an want to have it in my relationships now and in the future... yes

I think that there are very clear definitions about what makes an addiction-- no thing can be per se an addiction-- just like drinking alcohol isn't an addiction per se-- but can turn into one. I dunno how about taking hard drugs-- there are people who don't get addicted to them, despite taking them--

Would BDSM figure as a "hard drug" in the sense that it is highly addictive?
I think the difference between a "need" and an "addiction" in the official definitions is a real loss of control that is so intense that it affects your life negatively over a longer period of time and that you can't stop easily--

Bredon

I could certainly see it turning into an addiction in the right (wrong?) circumstances.

Personally, being new to all of this, it's very liberating. I've wanted something like this for a long time, and having gotten over my fears and expressed my desires to my wife, we're able to play in the ways we truly desire.

That feeling of freedom, liberation, trust... and of course, the sex... can be VERY intoxicating to the spirit. I glowed for 2 weeks after my wife and I had our little talk about my and her desires. I can see people not wanting that to end.

-- Penguin

Nobody really "needs" fulfillment on the job, right?

But are people happier with it? Most are.

Some are totally able to compartmentalize, and even a job that's just OK is perfectly OK and it's work anyway - who said it was fun? They get their fulfillment outside that.

Some people go totally insane when their work isn't what they want to be doing, like, "if I have to keep doing this I *will* go suicidal." Different people have psychologically differing profiles and desires and motivators. I find fulfillment making things and I'll never stop doing it. The jobs I've had without any agency or creativity within them, have been more or less like prison sentences for me.

I don't see it as an addiction, though I suppose someone else might frame it that way if they charted my behavior during a given week and saw how many hours were spent on jewelry.

THat is an interesting topic for discussion, and actually could be a thesis for someone looking to acquire a Master's in Psychology.

Do I greatly enjoy it? YES
Could I envision a relationship without it? No

Does this make it an addiction? Hmmmm... that would depend on how you define addiction.

Being a Dominant is a part of who I am, as much as being a smart ass or being right handed.... *shrugs*

any pleasurable activity can be addictive.

s_red830 said:

Is BDSM an addiction?
If it is, what do you think about it?
If it's not, what is the psychological "need" for it?

This isn't meant to promote one way of thinking, even though it kind of sounds like that by my last question. Unfortunately, that was the only way I could think of to phrase that.

I'm curious to hear what everyone has to say on this.

~Red.

Click to expand...

I prefer men who make a conscious decision to serve me rather than are addicted to it. YMMV. After all, I do not see being a lifestyle service oriented submissive as being substance abuse.

EB

Anything enjoyable can become an addiction of sorts and then there are the things you do because almost like breathing air, you feel you need them to live. That may be an illusion of sorts. After all having air, water, food, shelter and so on, allows us to focus even obsess on the things our spirit feels hungry for and nurtured by. Either way it certainly doesn't worry me. I don't feel like it will destroy my life like many addictions can. That's my two cents on the subject of BDSM being an addiction or not.

Fury

BDSM is not the addiction...

While sex is not a "need" per se, it is related to the human need for connection and as such, I think it is a primary drive and it can bring extreme pleasure so can become an addiction. An addiction that can create serious consequences in some people's life.

In the case of someone who is kinky, is the BDSM itself an addiction? I don't believe this to be the case, since for most of us who practice BDSM, it is a core aspect of our sexuality. Like Master_Phoenix stated, "Being a Dominant is a part of who I am..."

OK, will stop here as I am afraid that my thinking is becoming a little convoluted, LOL...

Neon

neonflux said:

While sex is not a "need" per se, it is related to the human need for connection and as such, I think it is a primary drive and it can bring extreme pleasure so can become an addiction. An addiction that can create serious consequences in some people's life.

In the case of someone who is kinky, is the BDSM itself an addiction? I don't believe this to be the case, since for most of us who practice BDSM, it is a core aspect of our sexuality. Like Master_Phoenix stated, "Being a Dominant is a part of who I am..."

OK, will stop here as I am afraid that my thinking is becoming a little convoluted, LOL...

Neon

Click to expand...

LOL!

Well I ain't worried 'bout no addiction cause I can stop anytime I want to, I just don't want to.

*smiles*

Fury

FurryFury said:

LOL!

Well I ain't worried 'bout no addiction cause I can stop anytime I want to, I just don't want to.

*smiles*

Fury

Click to expand...

spoken like a true addict you are a woman after my own heart, LOL