Halloween Challenge

[Magnetron]

I hope your family health problems are sorted soon, very selfishly I need you to make me laugh

I had 9 hours of sleep last night!




The Wanking Dead

Boners!
the horde of zombie belles mumbled
A gorgeous host of cock craving undead
Oh, Lord!
Not interested in gorging on our brains
clawing at our engorged peckers instead
Run for your lives!
far from these ghoulish girlfriends and wives
after us menfolk with their forks and sporks
brandishing unsharpened kitchen knives

 

[greenmountaineer]

Wendigo

As nights grow long on Lac la Biche,
the lake it freezes, the snow it falls
and the wind she always blows.
Wolves howl through long cold dark,
and prowl neath Aurora's flicker,
yet fearsome more than
winter and wolves
there comes a man,
no longer man,
they call the
Wendigo.

The waning moon rose over
a frigid land and I feared
I’d met my end.
The handful of hares
which fell to my snares
filled stomach but wasted flesh.
As strength and wit grew dim,
by hunger driven mad,
I longed for sweet bone marrow.

Late that night as the fire grew low
a shuffling tread drew nigh
the air was dank with beastly rank
and split by ghostly cry.
I rolled right to miss the blow
and grabbed my axe to counter.
Time stood still, I felt a chill
as iron vanquished bone.

All that morn, I gathered bush
to make the funeral pyre
at stroke of noon, I struck the flint
to cleanse the beast by fire.
Orange flames leapt high
and black smoke higher
till only ash remained
but there amidst the cinders
lay a roasted marrow bone.

In the silver moon of the Boreal night
beware one who walks alone.
Stay in your cabin with fire ablaze
and venture out not till dawn.​

This is spooky, Piscator, or should I say goulish? I may not sleep tonight. We have a cedar swamp in our backyard beyond the creek. I used to think the howls I heard at night were coyotes. I'm not so sure anymore!

 

[UnderYourSpell]

Sorry I've deserted you, not feeling so good. Thanks for posting, everything is wonderful. Back soon ...... I hope.

 

[Hard_Rom]

All Hallowed Eve

This night ghouls and goblins go about.
Wicked witches through the sky do wing.
We feast and fete, wear fanciful clothes
And laugh and leap between bonfires lit
To appease angry spirits and calm ancestral ghosts.
Make offerings to those from the Otherworld or
Chance chaos and calamity in your homes.

 

[Piscator]

This is spooky, Piscator, or should I say goulish? I may not sleep tonight. We have a cedar swamp in our backyard beyond the creek. I used to think the howls I heard at night were coyotes. I'm not so sure anymore!

Thanks gm, I hope you slept well.

 

[greenmountaineer]

This is spooky, Piscator, or should I say goulish? I may not sleep tonight. We have a cedar swamp in our backyard beyond the creek. I used to think the howls I heard at night were coyotes. I'm not so sure anymore!

Thanks gm, I hope you slept well.

Unfortunately, I didn't, Piscator. I dreamt about Madonna who offered to give a BJ to anyone who voted for Hillary, but she looked like Wendigo.

 

[Tzara]

Count Dracula Apologizes

One time, your body was my goal,
Your sumptuous blood my treat.
But I don’t want to steal your soul;
You’re just my favorite meat.

 

[todski28]

Unfortunately, I didn't, Piscator. I dreamt about Madonna who offered to give a BJ to anyone who voted for Hillary, but she looked like Wendigo.

Only way that could have been worse was if trump was first in line...

 

[darkerdreamer]

My ego is ash:
flakes away
like everyone else did.
You traitors.
I am a skeleton of me,
where is my meat?
Where is my me at?

I am the ghost of us,
where did we go?
We're haunting this house.

 

[UnderYourSpell]

Nobody sucks like my succubus,
no-one has that certain flair.
Engulfing with such sumptuousness
in the depths of the night, my affair.

No-one has that certain flair
to raise me from my deepest sleep
in the depth of the night, my affair
will stealthily bedroom creep.

To raise me from my deepest sleep,
from her tender lips, I shall rise,
will stealthily bedroom creep
under a false beauties' disguise.

From her tender lips, I shall rise
engulfing with such sumptuousness,
under a false beauties' disguise,
nobody sucks like my succubus.

 

[Hard_Rom]

Samhain

The fairies and spirit dead whirled,
Between this world and Otherworld.
Make offerings and go in guise,
When the veil 'tween worlds thinner lies

Mark this festival of the dead
With a great carved pumpkin head.
Make offerings to bless your home
For ghouls, goblins and witches roam.

All Hallowed Eve

This night ghouls and goblins go about.
Wicked witches through the sky do wing.
We feast and fete, wear fanciful clothes
And laugh and leap between bonfires lit
To appease angry spirits and calm ancestral ghosts.
Make offerings to those from the Otherworld or
Chance chaos and calamity in your homes.

These are the first two poems I have ever written. Nervous as hell to ask but some feedback would be nice.

Good?
Meh?
Poor?
Tripe?

Technical errors, flow?

I know they are not free verse which I hear is the in thing (for the last century). Kind of hoping the second one is not too bad. Big history buff and would like to be able to do alliterative stuff.

Please don't be to unkind to the noob.

 

[UnderYourSpell]

Samhain

The fairies and spirit dead whirled,
Between this world and Otherworld.
Make offerings and go in guise,
When the veil 'tween worlds thinner lies

Mark this festival of the dead
With a great carved pumpkin head.
Make offerings to bless your home
For ghouls, goblins and witches roam.

There's rather too many Whirl rhymes for my taste in the first stanza. (Whirled/world/underworld/worlds) If you're going to write in Rhyming couplets, you don't want to overwhelm with too many of the same one.

 

[Hard_Rom]

There's rather too many Whirl rhymes for my taste in the first stanza. (Whirled/world/underworld/worlds) If you're going to write in Rhyming couplets, you don't want to overwhelm with too many of the same one.

Not intention to use rhyming couplets. Didn't even know what that meant. But I can see that now I look at it. Is just intended as a very simple quatrain. I will look up rhyming couplets.

Thanks

 

[Hard_Rom]

Samhain

The fairies and spirit dead hurled,
Between this realm and Otherworld.
Make offerings and go in guise,
When the veil 'tween realms thinner lies.

Mark this festival of the dead
With a great carved pumpkin head.
Make offerings to bless your home
For ghouls, goblins and witches roam.

 

[UnderYourSpell]

Sorry to be picky, now it looks like you missed a rhyme because all the others are still in Rhyming couplets.

 

[Hard_Rom]

Sorry to be picky, now it looks like you missed a rhyme because all the others are still in Rhyming couplets.

Editing. Saw that and changed. Not picky at all. I guess I did intend to use rhyming couplets. But I can see point about over use.

 

[legerdemer]

Samhain

The fairies and spirit dead hurled,
Between this realm and Otherworld.
Make offerings and go in guise,
When the veil 'tween realms thinner lies.

Mark this festival of the dead
With a great carved pumpkin head.
Make offerings to bless your home
For ghouls, goblins and witches roam.

I like the playfulness and ghoulishness in this one. Also like the echo of "make offerings" in each stanza. I do have one quibble - the 'hurled'. I'm aware i'm putting you in an impossible position, because you were responding to another comment. It's just that the hurled, as it stands, calls to mind otherworldly spirits spewing their guts between worlds... Perhaps 'swirled'?

 

[legerdemer]

My ego is ash:
flakes away
like everyone else did.
You traitors.
I am a skeleton of me,
where is my meat?
Where is my me at?

I am the ghost of us,
where did we go?
We're haunting this house.

And speaking of playful, with a spoonful of wistful - this lovely short poem packs in more than it seems at first - wry and subtle.

 

[legerdemer]

Count Dracula Apologizes

One time, your body was my goal,
Your sumptuous blood my treat.
But I don’t want to steal your soul;
You’re just my favorite meat.

 

[legerdemer]

I had 9 hours of sleep last night!




The Wanking Dead

Boners!
the horde of zombie belles mumbled
A gorgeous host of cock craving undead
Oh, Lord!
Not interested in gorging on our brains
clawing at our engorged peckers instead
Run for your lives!
far from these ghoulish girlfriends and wives
after us menfolk with their forks and sporks
brandishing unsharpened kitchen knives

ouch! that last image would only be scarier if I were male, though I've wanted to do it to a joker or two...

 

[legerdemer]

I needed to futz with this a little. For one thing, I got the date of the election wrong - d'oh. Also, I thought that "too soon" didn't really work in line 6.

I wondered about the date, but figured you just wanted to get it over with and put it behind you.

 

[legerdemer]

I needed to futz with this a little. For one thing, I got the date of the election wrong - d'oh. Also, I thought that "too soon" didn't really work in line 6.

I wondered about the date, but figured you just wanted to get it over with and put it behind you. You pack a lot in this one, AH. All I can say is, turn off the boob tube and both boobs will go away. For now.

 

[legerdemer]

Breakfast in Plato's Café

Mommy who scotch-taped two Rice Krispies
on her nose to look like warts,
asks Peg, the waitress at Plato's Café,
for another pot of witch's tea
and a cup of cocoa for Princess Kate
who hardly could wait for Halloween
to wear her happily ever after
costume that comes with a magic wand

she waves over her cereal bowl
to make it snap, crackle, and pop
when all of a sudden-Snap, Crackle, Pop!
I see my shadow lifting on the wall
with the morning sun and it dawns on me
the trick is in knowing what is the treat.

Endearing, sweet and full of heart - the images very successfully realized.

(Though I hovered over the "I" a lot (not fully awake) to decide whether it was the same as Mommy; finally decided it was not.)

 

[legerdemer]

broke-necked pigeon
on chain linked mesh
sundials away

maggots drop from split ripe flesh
fresh death scents the air pollen allergies flare
retch the wretched sounds that spill
from blackened blood thick as tree sap

It feels real as steel
mahogany and gold plated
handles
pall bare the strip mined
concrete compound-eyes
of a maggots final form

Cycles continue
in the rot of not more
than here ever wasn't

fades to grey
matter the presence
lingers

all I want
is to
s
l
e
e
p......

This one indeed nearly brought out my gag response (ugh, maggots),
but I like how it plays with double meanings all throughout.

And especially in this stanza:

It feels real as steel
mahogany and gold plated
handles
pall bare the strip mined
concrete compound-eyes
of a maggots final form

 

[UnderYourSpell]

Samhain

The fairies and spirit dead hurled,
Between this realm and Otherworld.
Make offerings and go in guise,
When the veil 'tween realms thinner lies.

Mark this festival of the dead
With a great carved pumpkin head.
Make offerings to bless your home
For ghouls, goblins and witches roam.

I like this much better and I didn't see 'hurled' in quite the same way as Mer (probably because it doesn't really mean the same over here) but now it's pointed out i do!